why i won't be a lawyer, or alternatively, why i'm awesome

i initially began responding to the discussion in the comments of the post below, but i thought this discussion was worthy of it's own separate post, so here it is:

i entered law school fully intending to practice law. i had taken some "pre-law" courses in both high school and college, and was pretty sure that's what i wanted to do.

then i got to law school. first year was an adjustment. it doesn't really matter what you read or who you talk to, you aren't fully prepared for law school. but first year it was a challenge, and on the whole, i liked it.

i transferred for my 2nd year because i wanted to be closer to where i grew up, thinking i might like to go back there upon graduation. since then i've really missed my 1L friends (yes, even holmes). plus, i made the mistake of transferring to a horrendous institution, but that's a story for another day (and indeed i've discussed it on numerous occasions).

the summer after 2L i worked for a firm and, despite the money being good, i absolutely hated it. to put it into perspective, law-wise i was actually looking forward to coming back to this school for classes (though i was much happier over the summer being closer to dominique, friends, family, and a much nicer region of the country). and i was at the exact type firm which, if any, would have fit me best and made me happiest. and it was abysmal.

so, i have since decided that i'd like to use my degree and take my life in another direction. it's pretty hilarious to see other students' reactions when i tell them this...it's as if i'm breaking some code. but it's what will make me happiest.

money won't make me happy.
time away from dominique, friends, and family won't make me happy.
prestige won't make me happy.
power won't make me happy.
a nice title won't make me happy.
practicing law won't make me happy.
in other words, conforming to what i "should do" as a law school graduate won't make me happy.

for me, it's a nice balance of everything. and for me, practicing law upsets that balance. too much of one nice thing is worthless if you have none of another. come may, i'm off into the "real world" to find my balance. and i will. and i'll love it.

when i began, i was intent on going to law school to learn about the law, thinking that's what i wanted to do with my life. but that changed when i really learned everything that it entails. it no longer appeals to me. i could blame stuff i've read, or people i've talked to, or the inadequacy of pre-law programs, but i just think law school on some level is something you just need to experience to know if it's for you or not. no one else can tell you what's for you. the decision is all yours. the freedom is all yours. and it shouldn't be scary, it should be inspiring.

i think holmes is correct when he questions whether anyone really knows what they want to do for the rest of their life in their 20s. ok, maybe some do. but no one could surely expect everyone at these ages to know. and i dont feel bad about changing my mind. sure, maybe i would've done something else. but if i did, and never came to law school, how would i have known law school wasn't "it." that's not to argue that people should try everything first, but it is ok to try more than one thing.

i tried law school, and i liked very little of it. but really, i love that. because i admit that it's not right for me and know that going the non-practice route is what's best for me, i am fully embracing my complete freedom in may. even if i dont have a job lined up or dont know where i'll be living, graduation day will be a day of celebration. perhaps not in the traditional sense, but for me it will be much much more than that.