Confessions of a Litigious Mind

The random, irrelevant musings of a law school graduate.

Friday, March 10, 2006

advise me dear readers, hypothetically

so i have this situation i would like some input on, if you readers will indulge me. say, hypothetically, that i got a text message this morning at 930. let's leave aside the fact for now that 930am is too early to send someone a text on their spring break. i was a little bewildered at first, cuz the name came up as "[friend's] ho" as i never put her real name into my phone. let's say this is hypothetically a friend's girlfriend.

now, assume i havent talked to said ho in a long time. she never (hypothetically) leaves messages via text, email, im to just say hi or chat or anything like that. also assume there's no indiciation that she has ever thought very highly of me. evidence includes but is not limited to calling every time (sometimes more than once) i am out with my friend, and telling me (after i made a golf joke) that i'm "not getting anywhere near [her] sister." i've seen pictures of her sister. not interested, and i dont know why she thought i ever was.

so hypothetically, the text says that she's applying for a position in my high school's school system. it then asks me, hypothetically, to put in a good word for her with my father, who may or may not be in a high position on the school board.

i'm wavering on what to do. you may think i dont care for her that much.* if i were to hypothetically put a good word in, it might benefit my friend as well. an employed girlfriend is a less bitchy girlfriend. in this case, hypothetically, lets say that would be a change. so what would you tell me to do if this were a real situation? is there any ethical obligation on my part to say something? should i go with my gut feeling? or should she automatically be disqualified on the technicality of texting me at 930am and not being my girlfriend (the only permissible a.m. texts)? thanks, dear reader.




*any such notion is solely inferred by the reader, and cannot be conclusively drawn from this post.

UPDATE: i retract the statement regarding her never messaging me on AIM. she sent me an im to see if i got the message. oh, dont worry, i got the message.

18 Comments:

At 3/10/2006 5:26 PM, Blogger JLee said...

if you feel said "hypothetical ho" is qualified for hypothetical position, you should put in a hypothetical word for her..?? I confuse myself

 
At 3/10/2006 6:31 PM, Blogger The Namby Pamby said...

put in the word, but make sure you refer to her as 'ho' the ho time

[I apologize for the second ho...I could resist myself]

 
At 3/10/2006 7:32 PM, Blogger josh said...

well that's part of it, i only know her socially, i have no idea what kind of student/professional she is/will be.

people seem to be saying to tell my dad, but i feel like telling him would be comparable to ken starr recommeding oj as a date to a friend.

 
At 3/11/2006 1:28 AM, Blogger Supreme Monkey Overlord said...

how do you make the reference with no attachment to your name? it's like a terrible refernce, "would you hire him? this is my friend, he's cool, hire him" i've knownm him since 5th grade.

if the 24 YRold kid brought that to you, what whould you say? fuck him, hire only who you cn use to advance your career.

 
At 3/11/2006 10:56 AM, Blogger d$ said...

Why you bring a ho to a hotel?
'cuz a ho tell everybody! even the mayor!
Reach up to the sky for the HOZONE LAYER!

eh, id just tell the story to your dad.. about how she told you to "put in a good word for her" that way you are alerting your dad to the situation without actually putting in a good word, and when she asks you about it later you can honestly say you told your dad!

 
At 3/11/2006 6:58 PM, Blogger Brancibeer said...

Well, i think its all about what YOU think of her. Would you recommend her in your dad's position? The fact that she would text message you (not even call) out of the blue (just when she wants something) is a good judge of character. Thumbs down my friend. Thumbs down. I say its ok to be a dict.

ps- give me initials atleast....

 
At 3/11/2006 8:38 PM, Blogger josh said...

thanks for the input guys. i like the general idea. she told me to "say something" to my dad, so when i talk to my parents, i can just be like "hey dad, something!" then he'll be all "what are you talking about? are you drinking?" and i'll be all "no" and then we'll change the subject. hey, technically i told him something, right?

so i think matt, dominique, and brancy are pretty much right on.

brancy, the initials are a.b. i doubt if that'll help you much. it wouldnt have helped me up until a couple weeks ago. but i think that if you thought about it you could make a good educated guess.

thanks guys!

 
At 3/12/2006 10:21 AM, Blogger Yoda said...

It took me some time to understand the post minus the legalese ;-)

Its crazy on her part to tell you this over a txt msg. She should've called up (decent hour) OR left a voice message. If she considers this only as important as spending a couple of minutes punching keys, then why should you spend more time on it, put in good word etc. etc.?

I'd do what dominique said.

 
At 3/12/2006 9:56 PM, Blogger d$ said...

post her number, and consider it done.

 
At 3/13/2006 8:59 AM, Blogger Supreme Monkey Overlord said...

i can't be held responsible for my previous post, i had to click on my own name to make sure i wrote it. as far as i remember i was no where near a computer at 1:30AM saturday. of course, i don't remember anything past tequila, i'm sure you all know how it is.

as for a proper sober comment, i'm sure she'd be fine, initials are useless to me since ihave no idea what this persons last name is. but i have a good guess adn it seems like she'd be ok. just lay out hte story to your dad, he'll understand, and you'l be in the clear, you can pass the buck to you dad.

 
At 3/13/2006 9:12 AM, Blogger Brancibeer said...

a.b? Is it chumps sister? Ya, fuck that bitch. Seriously...i have no idea. Was she part of Voltron?

 
At 3/13/2006 9:30 AM, Blogger josh said...

not voltron...someone closer. think of someone who disappears whenever there's a girlfriend.

 
At 3/13/2006 12:53 PM, Blogger Brancibeer said...

Does he also fall madly in love every time? Did a.b. go to our high school?

 
At 3/13/2006 1:44 PM, Blogger josh said...

yes, and no

 
At 3/13/2006 3:10 PM, Blogger Brancibeer said...

Eureka! I know of the male but not of the female then. I do not think i ever met her...that bitch.

 
At 3/13/2006 11:43 PM, Blogger law monkey said...

well dicta, the solution to your problem is clear. you obviously don't have a good word to say about her, so how could you possibly put in a good word for her with your father? she just wants to use you and your ("hypothetical") connections with the man who will quite likely be in a position to determine whether or not she gets employed. don't be her bitch. that's your friend's job.

;)

 
At 3/14/2006 8:20 AM, Blogger Supreme Monkey Overlord said...

wait, does said person read this blog? i'd find it hard to imagine that he doesn't. with any luck this whole post will be lost tot hte eather and just missed or passed over

 
At 3/14/2006 11:13 AM, Blogger josh said...

i'm pretty sure this person doesnt read any blogs

 

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