if you're not me, i probably don't like you

and if you're in any way associated with the functioning of my law school, i definitely dont like you. except the cash register guy at the cafe. that guy's fucking awesome. warning: giant rant forthcoming. i'll try to post them in descending order of how much they anger me, but no promises, cuz, well, i do what i want. that's just how i roll.

1) my evidence exam. in case you just stumbled across this blog and/or dont already know, you have stumbled across the best blog in history. but also, at most schools law students can opt to type their exams. now, smart schools get a program such as SecureExam or Examsoft to load onto students computers, which essentially locks down the computers as to prevent cheating. but not my school. no, they rely on their computer labs, with the unusual environment and limited occupancy. so, there's the potential for students who want to type to be turned down (the legal term is shit out of luck) if they dont sign up early enough. but according to the ever-trustworthy school, "this has never happened." as a wisely untrusting person, i signed up early on the first day of signups, just in case. so, you can imagine my surprise when i got an email, along with 16 others, telling us that due to a "computer glitch" we got bumped from the computer lab for typing and we would have to handwrite our exams.

so i look at it like this: ok, if everyone who signed up to type got bumped, no big deal. cuz the advantage of typing for those who choose it is that they are more comfortable with it, and they feel they'll do best that way (i cant see why one would type if they felt better writing), so everyone would be on a level plane. but not everyone got bumped. ok, that's bullshit.

oh, but it gets worse. so we get another email saying they'll allow us to type the exam at 3:30 that day (the exam is originally scheduled for noon). how is that worse you ask? well, being a transfer student, i had to take criminal procedure, which is a first year class here, since i didnt take it at my old school. when they schedule the exams, they take into account which year the classes are for. long story short, my crim pro exam is already at 3:30 that day. so i clearly cant do both exams at 3:30, so i emailed them back telling them my problem. here's the response i got:

"We are doing our best to accomodate you. If you want to write you are welcome to do that. You were warned that our space was limited. Please see [Dean's Name] if you have a problem. Most students appreciate that we are able to allow them to type at the later time!" [exclamation theirs]

ok, so obviously by "our best" they mean nothing. and i clearly dont want to write, or else i wouldnt have emailed you, you dumb bitch. i was warned, which is why i signed up early on the first day (besides, i thought it was a "computer glitch?!" oh, that was bullshit? oh, i didnt know. didnt see right thru that at all). i WILL see the dean. and finally MOST STUDENTS ARENT TRANSFERS. jesus fucking christ on a fucking rusty moped with no front end tourque! did you even read my fucking email?!?! how fucking stupid are you?! ok, so clearly, not one sentence of the response was relevant.

and the sad thing is, something like SecureExam isnt even really a feasible option. despite the fact that this school is a huge, nationally-recognized university, the law building is so shitty that there arent enough outlets in all the rooms for the students to take the exams on computers! knowing how reliable computers are, we clearly cant rely on 80 batteries all lasting the entire 3-4 hours of an exam. all of this sort of makes the asbestos/lead in the water fountains at my old school seem like nothing. at least i was insulated.

so, in conclusion, i am the ONLY one in the entire class who does not have an option to type as of right now. cuz that seems really fair. assholes.

2) the xmas tree in the lobby. this is something i would probably care more about if i thought that xmas still had any religious significance. but still, how do the non-christian people who are actually religious at teh school feel? i havent seen menorahs, or anything else around the school. and its not like the tree is subtly tucked in the corner. no, its in the lobby. and right in the middle of the lobby at that. as in, you have to blatantly walk around it if you want to cross thru the lobby. fucking religion, dont get me started.

3) our school's cheating policy. the other day, we all got a pre-exam letter from one of our deans, reminding us of academic honesty since exams begin next week. it tells a heart warming story of a student who was seen cheating and turned in, and how his punishment was mitigated because of his [albeit after the fact] honesty in eventually admitting the cheating. then it mentions how he was suspended and must petition to return, how he failed the course, and how there's a letter in his permanent record which will be available to bar reviews in every jurisdiction. fantastic.

then, there was another email from an anonymous source, criticizing the weak disciplinary policy of the school, basically claiming the childhood rule "if you tell the truth [which this kid did only after he was caught], you wont get in trouble [or in this case expelled]." since then, there have been several more emails in response, criticizing anonymous for bashing the school and our dean. i'm sorry, what? how about holding the school accountable. the school got served, and they need to recognize this. it talks big shit about the horrible consequences of breaking the honor code/cheating, but when it actually happened they let the kid off. anonymous simply pointed that out.

the school should either talk shit and back it up, or not talk shit at all. and right now, it should probably eat shit too. what's so wrong about calling them out? they talked shit, and didnt back it up. fuck 'em! some of the other criticizms of anonymous go to the method by which they criticized (e.g. naming the student who cheated). i can see both sides of that, but you know what? i dont feel bad for cheater. you cheated. becoming known for it is a risk you took. sorry, better luck next time. you're not even a good cheater. probably shouldnt be here then anyway.


in conclusion, right now anyone associated with my school can just eat shit. the first thing bothers me the most right now, obviously, but the others suck too. i'll tell you this: i will NEVER give money to this school as an alumn, nor would i ever recommend anyone go here. in fact, i'd even recommend they not go here, due largely to the way things are run. how's that for a strong endorsement?