Confessions of a Litigious Mind

The random, irrelevant musings of a law school graduate.

Monday, October 16, 2006

wag the dog

another incident with mary. some of you may be sick of reading about it. that concerns me...not at all. i write for me.

but i finally let her know she pisses me off. i took the dog out today after lunch right before i was going to go back to school for my final 2 classes of the day, and meanwhile mary and jd (another hick neighbor, his actual residence uncertain) were outside at the picnic table talking. well, santos and i walk down the stairs and to the sidewalk leading to the backyard. he walks onto the grass, and crosses over the tiniest corner of the area mary had seeded and covered to regrow grass. all of a sudden i can hear mary,

"don't let him walk on the new grass! thANK you." bitchiest tone ever.

i ignored her and kept my back to them. santos finishes up, and we walk back up towards the stairs. he's excited at the sight of mary and jd because dogs lack the selectivity gene. he wants to go over and have them pet him. i pull the leash gently, then loudly and not-so-gently say, "santos, upstairs. i have to go to class now." i totally ignored mary and jd.

we walked up the stairs and to my door. when we went inside, i slammed the door. slammed it. once inside and out of earshot, i made sure santos knew he was good and i wasnt upset with him. then i packed up my things and left for class. when i walked outside, i completely ignored them again. mary knew i was mad at her. it was dead silent out, something it never is at my place. they didnt say a word. i didnt look at them.

i didnt have time or the desire at this point to get into any verbal altercation, but if she starts anything i will not back down. i will also mention how she needs to keep her fucking cats inside or on a leash if she's going to tell me what to do with my dog. still, i'm not going to listen. she will never tell me what to do, especially when my actions are already well within the realm of reasonableness.

i'm still really mad. and i miss my old neighbors, law students. what does that tell you?


POST-CLASS UPDATE:
(taking santos out. mary rides up on her bike)
"seriously, [dicta]. i just planted grass there."
"no, you planted grass there (points to other side of lawn)."
"but, it's the nitrogen is what does it. it's like fertilizer, only stronger. only, it kills it."
"that's great..." (walks away, blatantly ignoring)

8 Comments:

At 10/16/2006 7:00 PM, Blogger law monkey said...

why don't you just ask her to plant a special patch of grass for santos? that way, she can decide exactly where he gets to pee, since she's so concerned about it.

 
At 10/16/2006 8:30 PM, Blogger First Year said...

WTF...your dog can't piss on the grass? Does she prefer you have him piss right at her doorway?

Not like her roaming cats don't go pissing wherever they please. They're fucking animals its not like they can use the toilet.

 
At 10/16/2006 9:21 PM, Blogger josh said...

precisely. i have a lot stored away in case she gets on me about this further, including, but not limited to:

1) santos on a leash, her cats just roam anywhere, including up to my porch
2) her cats piss anywhere
3) the strays piss anywhere
4) other animals piss anywhere
5) i've lived here a lot longer than she has
6) she is not my landlord
7) my landlord allows pets, so he must have considered the possibility of them pissing in the yard (and probably prefers it to pissing in the apartments)
8) as a paying tenant, it is also my backyard

 
At 10/17/2006 12:06 AM, Blogger sadielady said...

seriously, wtf is up with neighbors and pet issues. i'm so pissed off at my own ex-neighbor tonight that i really am wishing that your neighbor crosses the line to the point that you actually punch her in the face (instead of just maybe thinking about punching her in the face) so that i can get my own little vicarious thrill of enjoyment from it. fuck her! (mary, i mean. although fuck my own ex-neighbor, too.)

 
At 10/17/2006 10:12 AM, Blogger LawNut said...

God this lady has a major stick up her ass - where does she want the dog to pee???? He's gotta do it SOMEWHERE!!! I hate people who have issues with dogs. Dogs Rule!!

 
At 10/17/2006 11:36 AM, Blogger josh said...

i know. and she's a gross old, dirty catlady too.

 
At 10/17/2006 6:37 PM, Blogger sadielady said...

tell her if her cat bothers your dog again your going to take her pussy and stuff it.

...oh, sorry. shudder.

 
At 10/17/2006 11:51 PM, Blogger josh said...

gross.

i'm going to keep ignoring her. not politely, but moreso blatant ignoring. turning my back and walking away when she talks to me, etc.

however, if i do that for a while i feel like she might call the landlord. i dont really think that would be a problem for me, but if she does that i'm calling animal control on her cats. the needle will only hurt for a second, cats.

 

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