Confessions of a Litigious Mind

The random, irrelevant musings of a law school graduate.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

[insert clever title here]

really? REALLY? it's not that i havent always thought people magazine was complete trash, cuz i have, but even this surprises me. i dont know why though.

i'm not sure on the criteria for "hottest bachelor" but i know this guy doesnt have it. if you're going to pick someone with gray hair at least pick someone older and distinuished...or at least respectable. this guy is pre-pre-prematurely gray. is that hot nowadays?

maybe it is. after all, america is changing. maybe next year it will be a 330lb guy with a beer gut, grease on his chin, hairy ears, and an IQ lower than that of a retarded alpaca.

"billy bob enjoys sitting, laying, sleeping, snoozing, snoring, guns, clogged arteries...and oh yeah, god."

you could sit on the street corner in any major US city blindfolded with a gun and shoot a "hotter bachelor" within your first three shots...and that includes misses.

now i dont swing the brokeback way, so this doesnt really affect me in any other way than the fact that cnn.com actually classifies this shit as news. but if people actually agree with this, well then america is in a lot worse shape than i thought. and that's really scary.

posted by josh @ 6/15/2006 09:55:00 AM

6 Comments:

At 6/15/2006 11:53 AM, Blogger Damon said...

While I also don't know or care much about this type of thing, it's great for me that a 29 year old with grey hair won, since I've had some grey hair since I was 19. Maybe in 4 years I'll look like him. But how pathetic is that that he's looking for the women he waved to on a flight. It takes more confidence than being American Idol to approach a girl that waved and did a double take!?

 
At 6/15/2006 1:07 PM, Blogger law monkey said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 6/15/2006 1:08 PM, Blogger law monkey said...

is it just me, or does he not resemble jay leno?

p.s. dicta, if you're unmarried by the time you have gray hair, i suppose what you're saying is, you'll be SOL because you won't be attractive?

personally, i don't have a problem with the hair. it's gonna be gray at some point, might as well get it over with now and not delay the inevitable.

 
At 6/15/2006 1:40 PM, Blogger josh said...

damon - i completely agree. good job, america. your "idol" is too much of a pussy to approach a woman on a plane. i can just see all those americans casting their votes..."oh my god, i wish i could be a big pussy like THAT guy!"

lm - that's not what i'm saying at all. if you read my post it says "if you're going to pick someone with gray hair at least pick someone older and distinuished...or at least respectable." i have nothing against gray hair, but this kid is what, in his late 20s? that's who americans want to idolize? well, i guess a lot of people look up to clergymen, and they molest little children.

so maybe i'm the one who's fucked up. well, fucked up is a poor choice of phrase. how about different. that works. i think i'd like to be different from the "average american."

 
At 6/15/2006 4:40 PM, Blogger d$ said...

dicta would be attractive even if he was bald!






(p.s. please don't ever go bald)

 
At 6/16/2006 1:13 PM, Blogger Supreme Monkey Overlord said...

i want to be anything but the average american. generally i tend to think the average american falls somewhere between "dumber than a box of rocks" and just plain old retarded. at least the box of rocks can't bother anyone.

 

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