schedule this

i was initially going to post about how after 20 years of school i'm not much, if any, better off than a truant, but something just happened 2 minutes ago that changed my life (morning). the phone rang.

it was a number i didnt recognize. in town, but an unknown nonetheless. i often just let the machine catch these, cuz what the hell do i care? if i dont recognize the number chances are it's not one of my friends calling me to golf on this great thursday. against my better judgment, i picked up the phone.

it was the dentist's office. i'm "overdue" for an appointment (we havent taken your money in a while). they also called last week and my dad took a message, and i knew i had to call them to schedule something, but i was waiting to figure out a couple interviews first, basically to help them so i wouldnt make an appointment and then have to cancel on them. i got an email back from someone last night, so i was probably even going to call the dentist later today to make an appointment. ohhhh, but not anymore.

it seems as though they've taken to realizing when people are "overdue" and now they call these people when they get free times open. they've been trying to get my mother too, so lately the phone has been ringing off the hook from the dentist's office. so she asks me if i can do 930am tomorrow morning. first off, thanks for the advance notice. dont you require 24hrs prior to cancellation? well, this is 23, and i cant make it. i'm gone this weekend (which is true). she sighs. [dont sigh at me bitch]

"how about 830 on tuesday morning?"

"ummmmm, yeah i have something then too." [a blatant lie. BUT, why the hell would anyone make a dentist appointment for 830 in the morning?! good god, its like my dentist doesnt even know me anymore. and i'm in the no cavity club too. if anything that's who he should know. but no, they pay attention to the people with the fillings and root canals and mouth herpes, because they are the ones who bring in the money (or diseases). it's disgraceful really.]

she got so frustrated (seriously, stop taking it personally) that she just said "ok, goodbye" in the bitchiest tone ever and hung up the phone. fuck you dentist lady. now i'm definitely not scheduling that appointment for a while. i hope she has to meet a quota of reschedulings, that she fails to meet it, and that she's fired as a consequence. then i will make my appointment for her last day, as she's about to leave, and i will flip her off as she walks out of the building and i walk in.

i am 25 and still in the no cavities club. you dont tell me when to get my teeth cleaned, i tell me when to get my teeth cleaned. got it, bitch?