Confessions of a Litigious Mind

The random, irrelevant musings of a law school graduate.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

the f list

as in failure. jesus, who would've thought that britney and "k-fed" would be such bad parents? how about everyone. and as much as conservatives dont want to hear it, this problem could have been solved by two words: recreational abortions.

stats tending towards MVA (most valuable abortionist) award:
1) ams ratio = (abortions + miscarriages)/sexual encounters
2) abortions per month
3) style points, for creative use of a hanger
4) loss of points for each baby (double points for twins, triple for triplets, etc)
5) 15 point penalty for use of contraceptives


hey, mississippi might finally win something.

posted by josh @ 4/12/2006 11:48:00 AM

5 Comments:

At 4/12/2006 12:29 PM, Blogger josh said...

lk - this reminds me, when should i expect those fetus cookies?

 
At 4/12/2006 12:59 PM, Blogger Brancibeer said...

Ya, who would have known.

[Brit] "Kevin, OMG, its like...crying again...this is SOOO not cool"

[KFed] "Shut-up and give me a blowjob"

Ha ha ok. I'm twisted.

 
At 4/12/2006 3:00 PM, Blogger law monkey said...

brancibeer - you're probably not very far off the mark.

dicta - in britter's defense, she really did seem to legitimately want a baby when she had sean. i guess she's realizing that it's not quite the same as playing "house" with her dolls.

 
At 4/12/2006 5:57 PM, Blogger josh said...

i dont care if she wanted a baby or not. some people shouldnt be allowed to procreate. particularly, dirty trash like spears. i think it should be mandatory that if abortions are banned, a rider is attached whereby some body (preferably me) gets to decide who is not fit to have kids. after all, there are only so many fast food positions available, and it would seem as though the now-living retards have a stronghold over them.

 
At 4/13/2006 10:50 AM, Blogger law monkey said...

so you'd eliminate yourself from the pool of permitted procreationists? :P

 

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