let's talk about sex, baby

let's talk about you and me, lets talk about all the good things, and the bad things that may be. well, that's supposedly what many of the titles named here claim to do. but there's a problem with the vast majority of these books: they're wrong.

someone once showed me a copy of "he's just not that into you" and i took a few minutes to flip thru it. smuggs has informed me that it's author is a comedian, and it's questionable as to whether or not the book was originally meant as a joke. upon hearing that, it made more sense to me. the book was interesting, but perhaps not cuz of the reason the person showed it to me. it was interesting cuz it was hilarious. for example, just observe the title of the first chapter: Chapter One: he's just not that into you if he's not asking you out.

or perhaps chapter 1 should just be entitled "use your common sense." wait, so that guy i passed on the street who looked at me didnt like me cuz he didnt ask me out? sounds like another reason to become a bulemic chainsmoker if you ask me. but i realize nobody did.

mockery aside (maybe), these books are pointless because they often give universal advice that by necessity is applied to unique individuals. they also set ideals into women's (and men's) minds that are unrealistic, so that every date you go on is a let down. oh but dont worry, said author has another book to help you with that too!

that being said, i have some advice for the ladies out there who want to find someone good:
1) while chivalry is certainly not dead, it's not the 1500s either (nor would you want it to be). of course, it's important to hold doors, treat the little lady to dinner, and compliment her (as long as its truthful). but some books tell women they should not approach men. that's ludicrous. what if it would be something good but you're both big pussies so neither says anything? of course, this logic applies to both genders. but maybe he's a bigger pussy than you are. why do you want to date this guy by the way? maybe you're really a lesbian, i dont know. holy tangent.

2) be what you want to be perceived as. be honest. and if you're looking to get felt up, poked on the dance floor, and have a one night stand, then dress like you're from jersey.

3) dont read tons of relationship books. how can someone compensated for each book purchased know the intricacies of you and your relationships? and if you do, dont tell the guy unless/until you're very comfortable with him, otherwise he might run as if he's a fetus and you work here.

the moral of the story is that the article was funny and i thought i'd go off on a tangent about it for 15 minutes, and maybe help some people out on the way. in my experiences, the best girls dont read those books anyways, while the ones who do have the potential to be crazy. granted most of these books are geared towards women, but as a guy who dates women (a preemptive strike at any gay jokes, nice try), i have never consulted any of these books (for reasons other than humor) and i'm quite happy with how that's going.