the greatest exam tip in the world

it can all be boiled down to three simple words: grow a mustache. i know this sounds crazy, but really, hear me out.

law school is graded on a ridiculous bullshit curve. you're graded against your peers. the better you do in comparison, the better your grade, regardless of whether your answers were complete shit or not. grow a mustache.

nothing takes law students off their game more than breaking their routines or study habits. by walking into class with a ridiculous mustache you will grab their attention and be a distraction. some will laugh, others will think you're weird, but either way, you've got them thinking about something other than law.

during the exam, be sure to stroke your mustache as you ponder your answers. make eye contact with anyone you can. get up and walk out into the hallway to get a drink, everyone will look (law students are nosy, they cant resist). they'll also look at you when you come back, mustache proudly on display. you're in their heads. the idea is to play your competition, not the test itself. that's how you win in law school.

and lest you think i'm a hypocrite, i can assure you i am not. i have definitely done this before, and holmes can attest to that.

i know what you ladies are thinking, "but dicta, i'm a woman, i cant grow a mustache!" wrong. let's be honest, there's a reason you're in law school and not magazines.