Confessions of a Litigious Mind

finally!

2010-07-02T11:18:00.002-04:00

it took way too long, but at least i'm not the only one hating on dell now

4 years

2009-10-23T18:59:00.001-04:00

looked at the date and realized today is the 4 year anniversary of coalm. sure, it's been 6 months since my last post and even longer since my last meaningful post, but hey, at least i'm not dead.

april fools?

2009-04-01T23:23:00.002-04:00

i just saw a news segment that more and more people are having to see the doctor because of injuries playing wii. it warned that playing wii tennis or wii golf is not, i repeat NOT, the same as playing real tennis or real golf and the remote should not be treated like a racquet or a club. if pain persists and your doctor says it's ok, take anti-inflammatories.

how disgustingly fat and out of shape are we if wii injuries are prevalent enough to justify a news segment? fucking ridiculous.

snow wonder

2009-03-03T19:44:00.002-05:00

i get it people, it snowed. TWO DAYS AGO. honestly, you've had 2 days to clean the snow off your car. did we get a lot of snow? absolutely. but you've had 48hrs now. even if you were in one of the areas that got about a foot, all you had to do was clean 1/4 inch of snow off your car each hour. especially you bitches in honda civics and ford taurus'. i was behind someone on the highway this morning driving a newer model honda accord. about 6 inches of snow was covering the rear windshield, the roof, both taillights and signal lights in the rear. even if this douchebag did signal, no one could see it. though my guess is they probably don't use their signal if they can't be bothered to clean off their car. many people would rather endanger themselves, and friends/family in the car with them, and everyone else out on the road or near the road than spend a few minutes outside to clean off their car. with people this lazy and stupid it's no wonder our unemployment rate is so high. it's not to say that it's an absolute, but if we can't (or won't) perform such simple tasks that have quite a bearing on our own safety (much less the saftey of others (much less our wallets if we hit and destroy people or property)), it says quite a bit about our character.

you heard it here first, unemployed people don't clean the snow off their cars (and not because they have no place to go).

state of the state of the schools

2009-02-10T23:21:00.002-05:00

i watch the local news more than i used to. about 98% of it is useless, but every once in a while i pick up something that happened. tonight, the first 9 mins of the news was just going town to town talking about how teachers arent going to be paid, schools will be closing, and ceiling tiles falling on kids' heads.

this is terrible. mortgages, foreclosures, yeah yeah yeah. but now it's fucking with the kids. for the love of god, we cant afford to have worse schools than we already do. people are already stupid enough. we cant let the education of children who have a chance to go straight down the shitter. maybe their retarded parents are lost causes, but the kids arent yet. they may be on their way, but they're not there just yet.

i find it funny that this economic stimulus thing gives out billions of dollars to all sorts of random shit, but there's apparently not enough to pay teachers and keep schools open. teachers should be better than they are now. i think we need more teachers and better educated ones. this will never happen if they're not sure how they will pay teachers after april. soon kids will only be educated enough to sit around and drool on themselves and end sentences in prepositions. where the fuck are our priorities at?

the wonderful beginnings of the baconator?

2009-01-30T00:31:00.001-05:00

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

it's the economy, stupid

2009-01-24T17:56:00.002-05:00

yesterday my company announced that they would no longer be providing paper coffee cups for employees. the email claimed it was part of an effort to become "greener", but it's really a way to cut costs (see also: making our objectives more difficult to meet so they dont have to hand out raises, changing our benefit provider to someone offering a worse plan, taking away saturday lunches provided by the company (which really hurts the company because it would spend approximately $70 each weekend to feed the 5-7 employees, however, people pretty much all ate at their desk and worked thru most of their lunch. essentially, the company was getting a 9th hour of work, or the majority of one, for free from everyone. now, everyone takes their full hour most days), and/or consolidating office space).

the good news: the company did agree to purchase the soap with which we can wash out our reuseable coffee cups.

10 girthy inches

2009-01-11T19:44:00.002-05:00

that was the forecast at least. i'm happy they were wrong (as is usually the case). we did get 4-5, which is way better than 10 (it's how you use it, really).

what it really meant was less snow to brush off the car at 730 this morning on our way to going to get our wii fit. and a wii fit we got. and a fat wii bastard i am. but it's worth it. definitely worth it.

when we got to the store, there were 2 cars already in the parking lot. we walked up to the doors behind the 2 people in front of us. the employees had mercy on us and let us stand in the warmth between the 2 sets of doors. soon after, a few more cars arrived. people from the next cars straggled in and stood behind. it obviously didnt take long before the wii was mentioned. surprisingly, a group of 3 men in one of the cars that was there before us wasn't even there for the wii. i dont know why else you'd get up that early and go to the store on a sunday, but who cares? to each his own. the other car had father and son, there both for the wii console and wii fit. we were talking about it with the father, a very nice guy.

at 8am, the lights were turned on and the inner doors opened. everyone proceeded to walk directly to the electronics section, towards the wii. everyone except those 3 men, and 1 woman who came after. instead, the woman cut in front of all the registers, and speed-walked thru the aisles to assure she was first in line. as we approached the checkout, the father who was there with his son let us go in front of them, in a very friendly gesture. we had been walking with and talking to them from the front doors to our destination. but sure enough, first in line was the bitch who couldnt wait.

basically, for her own health i'm glad all she bought was 1 wii console. we were somewhat concerned she was there to buy in bulk, if the store would allow. i also had my guess that the store had 15 in stock (that's how many they had the last time), but wasn't sure. there were plenty, and she didnt even buy the fit.

but it's situations like this that allow me to understand why people are trampled around the holidays. or why bitches get cut at stores. because if something had gone wrong, that bitch would've heard about it. not my fault you got there at 755 instead of 745.

in the end, it all worked out and wasnt all bad. we saw polar opposites. the bitch who arrived late but hurried around everyone and the guy who told us to go in front of him, even though we arrived at the same time as him and his son. sadly, it's the man who stands out because his actions are a lot more rare. but i'm happy, it was nice to see.

inter...ference?

2008-12-29T22:12:00.003-05:00

dominique and i enjoy the a&e show "intervention," though sometimes it upsets me.

every single person on the show has some life event(s) that cause (or i prefer, poorly justify) their addiction/drug use. their parent did drugs, they were molested, a family member died. i hate to bring it up, but lots of people go to church, and they dont all become drug users. and of course, once all this stuff happens, they get someone to diagnose them with bipolar disorder or adhd. excuses, excuses, excuses. maybe i'm just cynical, or maybe the producers always look for this pattern. but i don't think it's a fair representation of reality.

also, most of the episodes are from bible-thumping, "all-american", holier-than-thou regions of the country. weird.

sNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOw

2008-12-20T10:50:00.000-05:00

damnit. florida is looking really good right now.

happenings

2008-12-16T21:55:00.003-05:00

it's been somewhat crazy lately. though i guess most people could say that most of the time. it's rarely a good excuse, but often a justification.

i'm getting some extra training at work. i will soon be taking on some additional responsibilities (without additional compensation of course). the reward is some more interesting work on a day to day basis, though not always easier. plus i'll go to florida for a week in january for training which will be nice. i'm going to try to visit brancy too, if it works out for both of us.

dealing with people on a daily basis is a bit disillusioning. last week i caught 2 people in very specific, very blatant lies. people are always upset because they can never agree, or at least never want to take responsibility. i don't always mind when people get mad because i dont mind setting them in their place. because of this, my boss sometimes puts me in more difficult circumstances intentionally. sometimes it's a compliment, sometimes it's annoying.

i still have to do all my holiday shopping, though i do have at least 1 idea for everyone on my list.

overall, it's happy and healthy. good times.

the perfect xmas gift after all that thanksgiving "stuffing"

2008-12-03T23:42:00.000-05:00

shopping? on a wednesday?

2008-12-03T14:29:00.002-05:00

usually i go grocery shopping on sundays, but this past sunday we were visiting my parents for the holiday so we didn't go. plus i have today off so i figured i should stock up for the rest of the week. add that to the shoulder-to-shoulder sunday shoppers and long lines and going today was a no brainer.

wednesday grocery shopping is the bizarro world to sunday shopping. there are many fewer customers, and practically none below the age of 80. covering 1 aisle in less than 10 minutes is ridiculously efficient. those turning left have the right of way, and the preferred payment method is check (unless you have exact change in cash).

despite more room to throw elbows and the ability to pass on the right, i'm not sure wednesday shopping is any better than sunday. perhaps i should look into online grocery vendors, although that has potential to be a pretty big step towards reclusivity (not a word according to dictionary.com, but should be).

the ten strike rule

2008-12-03T10:11:00.002-05:00

sometimes i run criminal background searches on people for my job. sometimes i dont need to but i do because the people come across as sketchy or douchey. it amazes me how many of these people have multiple (or many) offenses, yet always receive a suspended sentence and/or probation only. i mean, they only have 4 priors, they've probably learned their lesson. until the next time that is. why are we surprised when they do something else again?

it's irrational to complain about crime when half the justice system doesnt do anything about it.

at last!

2008-11-30T19:29:00.002-05:00

a replacement computer, courtesy of my sister.

it's a dell, so it's a bit slow and has defects, but even i can't complain about a free computer. sure, another brand would probably be better, but if it were another brand my sister probably wouldn't have had to replace it herself. so maybe it's good that it's a dell. never thought i'd say that.

192!

2008-11-20T00:07:00.002-05:00

gas here was so "cheap" today that i bought a bunch extra to pour on the floor and roll around in. the burning sensation also helps with the colder weather that's come.

going out of business...sort of

2008-11-17T21:25:00.002-05:00

last weekend dominique and i met up with my parents for dinner. at dinner my mom told me that linens and things was going out of business and that they have a lot of kitchen/grille stuff that i should check out to see if i can get any deals. now i'd heard of linens and things, but due to the word "linens" i figured i wouldnt be very interested in the things.

so dominique and i went to the one near us. and i know why this place is going out of business. the prices are ridiculous. there was a pot there--yes, a pot--that cost $360. that was the going out of business price. i shit you not. that must be the best pot ever. for $360 i would expect the best meal i ever had each time i used the pot, and maybe it could jerk me off after i'm done or something. it had better for $360.

also, the "going out of business sale" was only 20% off. i'm sorry, but going out of business warrants at least 50% off items. 20% is more like "hey, it's presidents day, woohoo."

anyway, perhaps i will return when the things are closer to 50-80% off.

election musings

2008-10-31T20:43:00.001-04:00

what's the difference between sarah palin's mouth and her vagina?

only some of the things that come out of her vagina are retarded.

second income

2008-10-19T14:27:00.002-04:00

over the last week or so i have received at least 3 or 4 phone calls about an apartment for rent in a town near where i grew up. at first i figured the person probably just dialed incorrectly, but now i'm thinking that there was a misprint in the newspaper and my phone number got printed instead.

up to now, i've been nice and advised people that they have the wrong number. i even called one person who had left me a voicemail back to inform them that the number was incorrect (i know, very unlike me). i think if this continues i'm going to start renting the apartment out to anyone who calls. i mean, at worst i'd get first, last, and security from each, right?

supermarket sweep

2008-10-12T13:22:00.002-04:00

it's been a while since i've had any notable grocery store anecdotes (in fact, it's debatable whether this one is as well). it's not that people here are normal, it's that i try to get in and out quickly (that's what she said) and basically ignore everyone.

there was a young couple with 2 kids in front of me in the checkout line. their total came to $104, except that the guy withheld some type of prescription medicine and a bulk package of toilet paper. after paying the $104, the couple tried to pay for the prescription and the tp with what i just assumed was a credit card. i thought this was pretty annoying because, what the fuck, just buy all your groceries together like normal people, particularly when there are 3 more people/groups behind you. but then the checkout woman told them there was only a balance of $2.95 on the card. a debit card perhaps. then the couple has her call the manager over. the manager tells the couple that she thinks they can only use that card at pharmacies. the woman disagreed, but just paid cash and left.

while all of this was unfolding in front of me, the guy behind me sighed, "ugh, welfare. just get a job." now i dont know if his comment was incited by the ridiculousness of the checkout decisions or by the fact that the young couple in front of us happened to be black.

the guy then turned to me and said, "i work 6 days a week. i'm 50 years old, have 2 harleys in my garage, have a house here, and a house in vegas. it's amazing what you can accumulate when you just work."

i completely agree with his point that working is important, and that it's important to provide for yourself and work hard to earn things. i disagree with the assumption that the couple doesnt work if it was based on the fact that they're young, black, and have 2 kids. if it was based upon the attempted method of payment, perhaps it has more legitimacy.

either way, it got me thinking. i'd love to be able to afford 2 homes and 2 bikes when i'm 50 (especially that home in vegas). being that guy might not be so bad, except for the possible racist part.

"have a nice day" the checkout girl said. it snapped me out of my thoughts, and i suddenly remembered why i dont talk to anyone at the grocery store.

one year later

2008-10-08T20:41:00.003-04:00

today is the 1 year anniversary of me starting my current job. the year has flown by, with good times and bad. i can't believe i've been here for a year already. time really flies when you spend all day talking to assholes.

i'm kicking off year 2, day 1 in style---at a job interview with a different company.

best* hurricane score ever!

2008-09-28T15:04:00.003-04:00

91

not bad, considering the wrath of kyle lasted all 4.5 hours and i hadn't played in a month. three coworkers and i set the tee time last week hoping it would be nice out. we'd been talking about it all week, and would've been pissed if we couldnt play. so we did, despite the rain.

it's been a good few weeks. went down to virginia for dominique's birthday (happy birthday dominique!) and met up with some college friends. tailgated, went to a football game, and went to the old bars we used to frequent. very nice.

(possibly) more thoughtful posts to come...

*only

i'm back baby

2008-09-11T20:19:00.002-04:00

well, sort of. i'll likely be back more in a few weeks. but for now i'll sort of drift in and out.

my sister went back to school for her masters and got a new computer. i will be inheriting her old computer. i offered her some money, but she's nice and declined. she needed another computer anyway. my new (used) computer is a dell. but it's free. a free dell is the only type i'll take.

i've been working 10-7 lately. that probably has contributed a little to my lack of posting with much frequency. i do intend to change that, but getting home 730-745 after staring at a computer all day doesnt do much to intrigue me.

when i went into working the later shift i was sure i'd hate it. it has its ups and downs. the distribution of work is different, and i like it. i can sleep later, which is nice. but on the whole, it's tainted.

i hate getting home so late. dominique and i eat dinner together almost every night if we can, and i like that. i feel bad that she has to wait until 8-9 to eat, especially if i cook. and i cook less because of that, which i dont like, because i love to cook. dominique will cook sometimes too, which is cool because she's a good cook too. it's the nights that we get lazy and order in that it kills us.

my company hasn't been completely straightforward lately, and that bothers me. i figured i'd be working 10-7 at some point, but i dont like the way i found out. first, i might have to. then another person and i can rotate 2 months at a time. then i go first to be nice because the week it started the other person was on vacation and i offered to do it to help the others who already worked the later shift because there were so few of them. and now i'm stuck. i think the other person is going to have to go 10-7 too, but she's still not there yet. i knew i'd probably have to do it as a relatively new hire, and tha'ts fine. that's life. but i resent the way it came about, and now i'm stuck. if i have to work the later shift just grow some goddamn managerial balls and tell me, dont act like i might not have to until i'm already there.

f-r-e-e that spells free

2008-09-03T23:45:00.003-04:00

no, this is not political. does anyone else find the free credit report.com commercials hilarious in their ridiculousness? or maybe you just find yourself singing the songs to yourself.

dark magic

2008-08-23T00:27:00.004-04:00

this morning as i downed my third cup of coffee by 11am, i pondered something that i already knew but don't think about on a day to day basis. coffee is so wonderful.

i've been working a 10-7 shift lately, so i don't need coffee to be awake for the job. i generally drink between 2-5 cups a day, the majority of which are before lunch. while i may not need coffee to be awake, i occasionally need it for work.

the first cup of the day is for me, the rest are for everyone else. the caffeine kick works for me, and as i get more hyper i can deal with people a little more easily. that's not to say perfectly, however. win-win(-win).

(pit)bullshit

2008-08-08T20:38:00.003-04:00

last night after work i took the dogs out for a walk. we went around the neighborhood. we got some exercise. we pooped on the sidewalk. it was really nice, until the end.

we were only a few doors down from our own when santos and maeby stopped to smell the genitals of another dog that was also enjoying a walk. i began talking to the owner and another woman because (as everyone does) they asked me what kind of dog santos was (i still don't have a good answer for that). all of a sudden, this purebred pitbull comes charging at us out of nowhere. no leash or owner in sight.

now i love dogs. but pitbulls are not dogs. pitbulls are creatures. pitbulls have no feelings and there are no redeeming qualities to pitbulls. yes, i have been bitten by an (allegedly friendly) pitbull.

i guess this dog has figured out how to open the screen door to the apartment on its own. it came running and barking. and it wasnt a "hey, nice to meet you" bark as much as it was a "hey look at how fucking stupid and out of control i am" one. the other dog owner picked up her dog, which was little (all over, according to santos and maeby). i had a leash to one dog in each hand and they pulled me back a bit. the other woman, who i now suspect might be a man due to the giant size of her balls, stepped right between the pitbull and everyone else. she yelled at it and attempted to chase it back to it's apartment, and tried to get the attention of its owners (i dont know that she ever did). meanwhile, the other owner carried her dog back to her apartment, and i brought santos and maeby the other way around a building to get to our place.

this annoys the fuck out of me because pitbulls are an explicitly restricted breed at our apartment complex. furthermore, the woman with the balls told me that people have complained to our leasing office about it before and the office just said that they have to see it first. now i would think that if they're notified, they might try to check. the fact that a pitbull lives there means 1 of 2 things: either the owners didnt tell the landlord they have a dog, or the landlord didnt verify the breeds, as they did with us. this is a pure pitbull, there's no mistaking it.

if it were a random dog, or a non-restricted breed, i might let it go. but i fucking hate pitbulls, so this will likely be reported to the office. sorry, but i refuse to wait until someone or their pet is mauled before action is taken. pitbulls are useless creatures that should be euthanized as soon as they pop out of their mother, who should be euthanized immediately after.

the point was fast but it was too blunt to miss

2008-08-07T21:10:00.002-04:00

yesterday morning i was walking out to my car to go to work when a guy drove up in the parking lot and stopped next to me. he asked me a few questions about the apartment complex. the makeup of the apartments, the rent, utilities, etc. despite his longer hair in the back to compensate for his receding hairline, there wasn't necessarily anything sketchy about him. i mean, he wasn't white trash, but he also wasn't the type of guy i'd leave unsupervised with my kids. your kids, maybe.

but my first thought after he pulled away and i got into my car was "i hope that guy didn't see which apartment i came out of so he could go rob it now." that was kind of a wake up call. i really need to get out of the customer service business. dealing with angry people all day only fuels the paranoia.

i never thought i'd say this...

2008-08-04T20:08:00.003-04:00

but i'm kind of sick and tired of arguing with people.

part of my job is arguing with people on a daily basis. it's not in the job description, but it happens as a result. and i dont know that i'm tired of just arguing, i think i'm tired of it because 99% of the time;

a) i didn't do anything wrong that would make someone yell at me
b) i have the same general arguments over and over again
c) a lot of the time it is what it is and if you dont like it i dont give a shit so you should shut the fuck up and accept it, or
d) i just dislike people in general and find it amazing how much they (in general) feel they are automatically entitled to regardless of their actions and/or responsibilities.

i think it's usually a combination of these things, but it can really be any one of them. my job is an interesting one for someone who was already fairly cynical about human nature to begin with. seeing people at their worst surely doesnt change that much. i'm really glad i never decided to be a defense attorney.

peanut butter sauce

2008-07-30T21:04:00.002-04:00

dominique and i live near a friendly's. every once in a while, we get some of the take-out ice cream for dessert. today was one of those days, which is why i was happy to see the chubby girl behind the counter.

certain people are made for certain jobs. i'm not saying overweight people are made for scooping ice cream, but i will say i never mind when they're scooping mine. now i'm not talking morbidly obese people, no. if they dont have respect for themselves, they wont have respect for my reese's pieces sundae. but as soon as i saw the slightly overweight girl making my sundae, i knew she would honor my request for extra peanut butter sauce.

gotta be careful though, or else i'll be scooping my own sundae's soon.

whoever decided that it would be a good idea to give the public access to automobiles was a giant fucking moron

2008-07-25T22:32:00.001-04:00

a match made in heaven

2008-07-13T17:50:00.002-04:00

since dominique and i have moved, the closest supermarket to our apartment is now a shaw's rather than stop & shop. the first time or two that i went shopping there i was happy with a broad selection and what seems like reasonable prices. or perhaps it is just the change of scenery that is nice. whatever it may be, i was liking shaws...until today.

i went for routine groceries. as i was perusing the meat section, i heard something over the store speakers that would change how i felt about shaw's. at first it was faint, but i listened closely and my initial thoughts were confirmed--they were playing a meatloaf song.

shaw's, i love you.

backwards

2008-07-10T23:08:00.002-04:00

i was just watching the news and saw this story about how some 71 year old supermarket employee tried to grab a 5 or 6 year old kid in the restroom. luckily, the kid's father was also in the restroom and the old guy didnt realize it and got the shit beat out of him. due to his old age the employee was not arrested but was issued a court date. however, the 31 year old father who beat the shit out of an employee who tried to molest his kid in a supermarket rest room did get arrested and has a court date for assault. i don't have any kids, but if i ever saw someone try to molest someone else's kid in a restroom i'd beat the shit out of them. this is why i don't watch the news too often.

all moved in!

2008-07-05T21:37:00.000-04:00

woohoo!

we're moving this weekend!

2008-06-25T20:54:00.000-04:00

woohoo!

very one-sided

2008-06-21T15:42:00.003-04:00

i think that my dialog on friday went something like this:

- good morning
- hey guys! good boy, good girl.
- have a nice day, see you this afternoon
- morning, got any weekend plans?
- morning
- morning
- morning. anything good this weekend?
- morning
- yeah, we should set up a trip to the casino soon
- damnit, 8am
- fuck you
- fuck you
- fuck you
- what can i do for you?
- fuck you
- wow, you're a piece of shit
- fuck you
- it was nice talking to you. let me know if there's anything else i can do.
- fuck you
- yeah, ruby tuesday sounds good to me too
- fuck you
- fuck you
- fuck you
- the food is here
- this is really good
- yeah, i can go back upstairs. i have a lot left to do too. that's fine.
- fuck you
- fuck you
- fuck you, call me back when you get this
- fuck you
- fuck you
- yeah, i will
- fuck you
- have a good weekend
- have a good weekend
- see you on monday!

this is the problem with a job that has lots of customer interaction.

----------------------------------------------------------

and speaking of customer service, i still hate cvs. maybe more than ever.

last night i called to have a prescription refilled. it's something i take daily for my stomach. i ordered it, and set the pickup for today. when i got to cvs, they told me that the medicine had been discontinued. obviously i was surprised. they said they had tried to call me but they had the wrong number. now i find this funny because i've only had 1 number for the last 4 years, and i've only been living here and using this cvs for 1 year. and the first time i got a prescription filled there i had to update all my info with them, so i know they have it. but cvs is retarded.

so the girl was just like "we dont have any more" and shrugged at me. she told me i could call my doctor to find out about this (which i of course planned on anyway. i just saw the doctor last month and he gave me a number of refills but didnt mention anything about a discontinuation). she also said she didnt think anyone else had it either. call your doctor.

so naturally, i called walgreens. walgreens confirmed that it appears a discontinuation might be inevitable, but walgreens happily and curteously searched other stores to try to find some for me for right now until the question of the discontinuation is answered. granted i was talking to the lady on the phone, but i dont think she just stood there and shrugged at me. furthermore, she didnt even mention that i call my doctor until i brought it up that i would. she said she would gladly continue search other locations for me to find it if she could in the future. i advised i would call my doctor to confirm and maybe see if there were another thing i could use in the meantime. on top of all this, walgreens took my info and she said that she would call cvs to get my prescription over to walgreens and that i didnt have to do anything. obviously, i thanked her.

the short of it is that while cvs just stood there and sucked their own tiny collective dick, walgreens actually tried to help me. so there you have it, shitty customer service - another reason to hate cvs. fuck cvs, use walgreens.

UPDATE: i had to add an update. as it turns out, walgreens is not one of the approved providers or fucking whatever for my fucking insurance. i have insurance, i pay what i feel is too much for it, and it doesnt fucking cover one of the largest fucking pharmacy chains. fucking perfect. so i'm still going to get my shit tomorrow, but instead of $5 it will be $40. it's not their fault my insurance is fucked. and they really helped me out while cvs just sat their like a fucking retard at a physics convention. so fuck it. and then i have to have a talk with my doctor this week, and maybe my insurance. fuck.

difficult decisions

2008-06-18T18:36:00.002-04:00

i don't know if i should be wearing a celtics championship shirt, or a red sox world series shirt, or one of the many patriots super bowl champion shirts. i never thought getting dressed could be so complicated.

------------------------------------

in other news, dominique and i move next weekend so we've been preparing for that. we'll have everyone over once we're settled, hopefully sooner than 9 months this time.

new school

2008-06-17T22:18:00.002-04:00

i watch the food network a lot. the channel has really evolved from the beginning, for the best i think. today the network is marked by stars like rachael ray, bobby flay, and alton brown (who could really do any show on the network as well or better than anyone else).

emeril is yesterday's news, and with good reason. personally, i've tried some of emeril's food line and thought that it kind of sucked. but even moreso, the network is becoming more accessible to the everyday person. it's brilliant. most people cook in some capacity, or find interest in some facet of cooking. everyone has to eat. but emeril's show doesn't focus on easy to make recipes. sure, some are, but i always found his show was an effort to flaunt his skills, but i think the flavor is lacking.

eh, there's no point to this. just like the last few posts, it's just trailing off in the end...

today i talked to some of the trashiest people ever...

2008-06-02T20:09:00.002-04:00

and they weren't even from pennsyltucky. i know, i was as surprised as you (though i didn't quite ask them their state of origin, who knows).

it's not that i don't like my job, it's that i don't like it some days. but sometimes those days are bad enough to wander onto careerbuilder, etc. every job has days like that. i constantly deal with people though...bulllllllshiiiiiiit.

but the girls upstairs are out and our landlord can't rent the place. we only have another month here then it's off to a slightly more private place surrounded by different people.

still no computer.

today was annoying

2008-05-27T20:21:00.002-04:00

but the weekend was sweet. anyone do anything cool?

my golf game sucks. i'm now just bad at golf. i'll be lucky to get back to where i was 2 years ago, but of course the ultimate goal is to improve. i had a pretty bad round yesterday, but on the bright side i hit 2 of the best drives of my life with my new driver. so maybe i'm getting there.

last call

2008-05-17T23:15:00.002-04:00

dominique and i have lived in the city for almost a year now. personally, i'd say it's been about 11 months too long. that's not entirely fair, because there was definitely a period of time during which it was novel and interesting. but eventually the realization that living in a city meant living amongst a lot of other people kicked in. and it stuck.

despite living in the "good" part of the city (i think "best" is more accurate since it's a much more relative term), it's getting a bit out of hand. ignoring the often shitty neighbors, the lack of privacy, the parking issues, and the more expensive rent, there are still a lot of problems. a perfect example is last august when our bikes were stolen out of our garage. now i accept some responsibility for that because we forgot to lock them up before leaving town for the weekend. however, i also feel that ideally you shouldn't have to lock up your bikes, even if you live in a city. ideally. but that's why idealists are stupid.

but last night was the last straw. one of our neighbors who lives upstairs from us had her car broken into last night. in our driveway. her car was parked right behind mine, and 2 out from dominique's car. the person broke the passenger side window to get in. unfortunately for the poor planning piece of shit, there wasn't anything enticing in the car, so it was all for nothing. when the neighbor discovered this, she was hysterical (and who would blame her?). she reported it to the police this morning, and was told that 3 other cars on our street were also broken into last night.

the (not really) worst part is that i think i may have heard it last night. as we were going to bed i heard what i would describe as a tapping sound outside. but it had been raining a little and i thought it could've been water running out and dripping on something. i got up twice and looked out a couple of our windows. except for the darkness, i might've even looked at the person (or people) out the kitchen window. i even contemplated going outside to see if i could locate the sound. who knows whether that would've been a good or bad thing.

i was before, but now i'm really happy we're moving in a month or so. but this still really pisses me off. it'll probably make me somewhat neurotic every time i hear a sound outside. do i have to go back to the pennsylvania days of sleeping with my spare 2-iron next to my bed? (there were reports by my neighbors that someone had tried to get into my apartment one summer.) maybe, i don't know. would it do any good? maybe, or probably not. either way, i'm really fucking pissed off that i'd even have to consider it.

tonight dominique and i went out to dinner. when we got back, a house at the end of the street was having a party. there was a live band outside, it was nice. we took the dogs and grabbed some chairs and hung out outside because it was warm. we grabbed a few beers and some cigars. while just trying to have a nice evening, we saw numerous, numerous sketch-as-all-fucking-shit cars pass by down our road several times. what the fuck? we can't even sit outside our own fucking apartment and enjoy the night without being totally sketched the fuck out. i can guarantee you that there is nothing in our neighborhood that would warrant doing laps like this.

the city is extremely frustrating. i hate that it is impossible to mind my own fucking business and not bother anyone but yet not feel safe in and around my own fucking house.

fuck this bullshit, fuck the city, and most of all, fuck people.

unsettling in

2008-05-16T19:21:00.002-04:00

lately i've been experiencing something interesting. normally, the better i get at something, the less frustrated i am with it. but my job is going somewhat differently.

overall, i still like my job. i really like the people i work with, and the work atmosphere is great. i'm finally settling in to the position and into an area with which i was completely unfamiliar prior to this job. each day is different, and i'm required to use my brain as opposed to being some mindless drone performing useless busywork.

that said, some days are more frustrating now. i do my work better, i know more, and i'm much more self-sufficient than in the past. i'm not bored during the day, and i always have plenty to do.

i think the problem is that my job requires a lot of daily interaction with customers and non-coworkers. as i was still learning, i probably just didn't notice the ignorance or stupidity around me as much because i had to focus on what i was doing and what needed to be done. but now that i'm better at my job and i'm more familiar with the necessary processes, i am better able to focus on the other people with whom i deal. in one respect that's probably a good thing, because it probably improves the quality and efficiency of my work. but on a personal level i'm beginning to find it bothersome.

it's just amazing how stupid many people are, or how little they care. how self-centered they are, and how they think they deserve everything after doing nothing. how they're just rude in general.

i like my job, and i like the people with whom i work. but sometimes i question the choice to work in such a public-oriented position.

i'm back baby!

2008-05-11T20:23:00.003-04:00

no, i didn't get my computer fixed (or a new computer). but i did have a good weekend.

friday i went to the casino with a buddy from work. it was the first time in a few months and it was pretty sweet. he finished about even and i finished up a decent amount at poker. my friend brought some pretty good cigars so after we were done in the poker room we walked around the casino with those. on the way out, we figured what the hell we had a good night let's play a spin or 2 of roulette. so i put 20 down and hit and ran. the good old birthday paid off to the tune of $175. good for something.

saturday dominique and i finally found a new apartment. it's ours if we want it so i think we'll be heading in july 1. it's a 2 floor townhouse in a complex of the same. nobody above or below us. minimal interaction with neighbors unless we want to interact with them. unlimited parking. a grassy area in the back and a park up the hill. nice.

then at night we went to a bonfire with some friends and a couple beers. good times.

today i called my mother and then we went up to visit dominique's mom and we made a nice salmon dish with grilled garlic corn on the cob. i even got to see the end of the player's championship.

i don't really want to go back to work tomorrow (who ever does), but at least it's after a good weekend.

ugh

2008-05-08T22:25:00.002-04:00

it's been an interesting week.

we're going to a wedding in june in san francisco. we just got the official invitation with the confirmed dates a couple weeks ago. right now the cheapest tickets we can find there are like $500 each.

the other day at my job i talked to a 26 year old. during the conversation she mentioned to me that she couldn't get a rental car because the company required a deposit and she didn't have a credit card or cash to put down. there was a possibility to waive the deposit, but she didn't have 2 utility bills in her name to prove residence and she didn't have a recent pay stub because, oh right, she doesnt have a job and is on welfare. oh and has a kid (who is probably really well provided for). what the fuck. 26 and no job on welfare? listen, i know its not at the top of anyone's list, but get a fucking job at mcdonalds or something. the fact that i work 40hrs a week and only net 66% of my "earnings" part of which goes to stupid bitches who get knocked up and dont do shit kind of pisses me off. honestly, there are some jobs that will take anyone. it's not always glorious, but take some fucking responsibility for yourself. i can see if someone is older or is unable to work for some reason, but this was just someone who was irresponsible.

and it wouldn't be a good ranting post if i didn't mention how much dell fucking sucks. it was probably a long time coming now, but my computer is all fucked up again. it wont turn on. it kind of does, but the screen doesnt show up. it sometimes flashes my desktop for a split second and then the screen goes black. it just started happening yesterday, and today it's just a useless pile of shit taking up space. hopefully i can get all the shit i have on there off. i think the hard drive should be ok but who the fuck knows, it is a dell. and who knows when i'll replace it. not really on top of my to do list lately. especially for the cost of new computers. maybe i wont get one. all i do on my computer is fuck around online.

i've just sat here for 5 mins and literally cant think of a way to wrap this up. so i'm just finished for now.

the state of the union

2008-04-30T23:27:00.002-04:00

in a word: fucked

today i got a haircut on my lunch break. two of the hairdressers at the place were talking about the election and campaigning. they thought obama's name was osama. they truly and honestly did not know his name, much less a damn thing about any of the issues or what anyone stands for. i bet they could tell you he's black and that hillary has a penis.

we are all fuckity fuck fucked. welcome to america, where people are ignorant assholes, but at least they give enough of a shit to talk about stuff without any knowledge basis?

utter randomness

2008-04-29T20:35:00.003-04:00

i seem to have stepped away from the computer in the last week. oops.

dominique and i have spent a lot of time searching for (and touring) new apartments. we've seen a few that we liked on paper, but as usual they all seem to have a problem once we get there. the ones with only one problem seem good at first, but then i remember the place here only has 1 problem too, and it bothers us everyday. so we are basically looking for perfection (or at least something problem-free), which is why we haven't been successful yet.

i played in my second golf tournament. i played a little bit better, but i still can't hit the driver too well, though it is getting better. i decided (impulsively, of course) to get a new one on sunday night, and found a bargain on ebay for a new 2006 adams 9.5 degree redline rpm 460cc driver. now i'm just itching for it to get here.

i haven't played poker in weeks. online is crap.

the job is good. every year employees get to sit down with their boss and talk about career opportunities or paths that are available. i've only been working here for 7 months, so this was a good thing and i got to learn a lot about what's out there, which was cool. i like that they sit down with you individually to talk about what you want to do and what possibilities are out there. the job is still a job though. i deal with people all day which, as you might guess, definitely wears on me from time to time. especially when some of the people are assholes. and the problem is that my position can sometimes be a conduit of bad news, and i come out looking like the bad guy for decisions that come from above. but hey, that's what entry level is for i suppose. maybe that's why we have those meetings.

looking forward to a wedding this weekend, and seeing my parents. should be a nice break. things are pretty good in general, but tiring. i should just win powerball already.

nobody cares about this post. i think i just wrote it for myself. i dont care if nobody cares. i feel better. nice.

movin' on up (to the east side?)

2008-04-21T22:52:00.002-04:00

it was only a matter of time. dominique and i are searching for a new apartment.

we want to stay in the same general area because it's close to her work. i have a 20 min ride, which i don't mind. i enjoy the time in the morning to wake up and listen to a little music.

but this apartment has really gotten to me (us). in the beginning, much to everyone's surprise, i was patient about everything. in the first couple months, dominique already had the foresight to dislike certain aspects of the living situation. i had the same foolish optimism that i so often mock, insisting that things would get better. and to some small extent, i was right. it did get a little better. but that doesn't mean it ever became good.

certain things about the apartment are good. it's big. it's in a decent location/neighborhood. the rent is cheap and includes heat. but the sucky is starting to outweigh the good.

the parking sucks. it's a daily pain in the ass (sometimes at least twice). parking cars, getting cars out of the driveway. having to call people you dont want to call, people who don't want to be called. and vice versa. staying up late every weeknight. our daily routine has become an adjustment to suit other people. at first it was just a new experience. it was living in the city. now that the novelty has worn off, it is what it is--a pain in the fucking ass. everyday. every goddamn day. right now even. this very second as i type, dominique is receiving disappointing news on the phone from the neighbors. oh great, one of the dumb cunts parked in the middle of the fucking driveway and then went out drinking. her roommate doesn't know when she'll come home, or if anyone else will. right now all the cars left would fit in the driveway, unless others come home. it's not that i necessarily want to go to sleep now, but i'd like to go to bed. maybe watch the daily show/colbert report, or good eats. whatever. but i don't want to be sitting here on the couch waiting for some drunk slut to come home to pass out. on a monday. this is our fucking daily routine.

besides that, there are landlord issues. they don't affect the day-to-day stuff, but they're there. promised improvements or repairs that have never happened. a feeling that she's the type to try to fuck us out of the security deposit. when we moved in, she charged us first month/last month/security deposit, which is technically illegal here. landlords cannot require all 3. that's just as much our fault for not knowing the law at the time as it is hers for either not knowing it or ignoring it. the last month money is already gone, so now that it's paid it'll be nice when the last month comes and we don't need to pay the rent.

given my general distaste for complete strangers, i think i've survived fairly well in the city. and we'll still live here, or in this general area. but we'll find a place with more privacy (hopefully). if nothing else, we hopefully will not have to call someone to get our car out to get to work in the morning. or dealing with people asking to use our new grill then not covering it or scraping the shit off or showing any sign of appreciation or respect for someone else's shit. or having people throw cigarette butts out the 2nd story window to our front steps and where they know our dogs walk. or all of this together. everyday.

and the real kicker is that overall, we might have even been a bit lucky with the neighbors we had. it's obvious we need our own place. a more private one. i mean, between the alcoholic movie-stealing mexicans in south carolina, mary in pennsyltucky, and this, i have quite a track record with neighbors.

the coolest and least cool things, ever

2008-04-17T17:48:00.003-04:00

let's start with the bad: american idol. this show is just retarded. first of all, it pisses me off that it starts and ends several minutes before/after the hour. when i want to watch a show, i don't want it to start at 9:04. i want it to start at 9:00. what is this bullshit? besides, enough moronic americans like that shit, so i'm sure advertisers would pay more for commercial spots than they already do. so cut the fucking commercials if you really can't trim the show down to keep it inside the fucking hour.

second, honestly. i caught the last 4 mins the other night because the tv guide channel neglected to mention the true end/start times. i have to admit, some of these people can sing. well even. but here's the thing: these people are singing hits. ask them to sing some of their own shit (if they are even non-shitty enough to write something) and i'm sure it will suck. these people should never be anyone's idol. however, maybe it's more american than first glance shows. have someone else do all the real/hard work, while someone else has the glamorous side and takes all the credit. it's all a moot point anyway, because all the finalists end up getting offers anyway, then they fade back into anonymity where they belong (well, or the tv guide channel).

----------------------------------------------------------

now for the good: boycotting/picketing kfc. there's a kfc a few minutes away from our apartment on my way home from work. tonight there were people out front with signs, trying to deter people from eating at kfc. what makes it even more hilarious is the sheer number of boycotters--3. 3 fucking people. they didnt even have enough people to hold up all of their lame signs. one sign had the circle with a line thru it saying "broken wings, broken legs." it didn't even make sense, really. and even if i could ignore all of this ridiculous, let one thing be very clearly known: i would never, ever, EVER let some douchebag in jean shorts dictate my eating habits. i drove on past, but if tonight had been one of the nights on which dominique had night class, i definitely would've picked up my dinner at kfc just to spite them. maybe she'll be in the mood for some fried chicken...

fore!

2008-04-14T18:03:00.002-04:00

sunday was my first golf tournament in my league. my performance can pretty much be summed up by 1 word: unimpressive.

i can sort of give myself a break on this one. now, this doesn't mean excuses. i played pretty horribly (well, moreso on the back 9). but this was my first full round and i was playing with new clubs. i like them a lot, especially the wedges and 9 iron. but i don't get as much distance with these clubs as i did with my old ones, and i don't like that.

this was also the first time i'd ever been in a league or tournament. my league is both. every event is tournament. i think that makes it cool.

for the first tournament, they picked a narrow course. and the league has me at the blue tees because of my handicap. now, when i submitted my approximate scores so they could assign my estimated handicap (until i have enough scores to officially get a real one), i didn't even think about it, but my scores are from the white tees because that's what i usually play. i think i could score just as well from the blues if i can just improve my driving accuracy. so that's something to work on.

all in all, it was really fun though. got some exercise, played some golf, met some new people (i know, i hate people, but i did kind of like 2 of the guys i played with), and i almost even won some money on the first round. on the closest-to-the-pin hole i knocked my tee shot to 6ft 6in. unfortunately, someone had already hit it to 6ft even. oh well, honorable mention.

funny, the haha kind?

2008-04-09T20:55:00.002-04:00

we got new computers at work today. the old computers were dells. the new computers, also dells. aka, pieces of shit.

so naturally, this morning we had to turn them on for the first time and make sure they work. they went thru their initial installations and whatnot, which normally take a few extra minutes the first time. no big deal. except that mine didn't work. it froze, then moved slowly, then froze again. after wasting an hour, i finally just went back to my old computer. luckily, there were a lot of tech people in the office today so it was like having the helpdesk next to you.

the good news: it only took experienced tech people 9 hours to get my brand new piece of shit dell computer to work. but finally, it does (i think).

the bad news: it's still a piece of shit dell.

dell fucking sucks.

it's been a while

2008-04-07T18:40:00.003-04:00

i do have some things to write about, but usually they come in the morning. by the end of the day i'm either too tired or have forgotten about whatever i had. it's probably both a good and bad thing that i don't have access to blogger at work, though i admit it probably does detract from some of my posts.

the other thing is that things are going pretty well right now. my posts have usually been fueled by problems or ignorant people, and there haven't been too much of either lately. well, except on the road. people are fucktards when it comes to driving. but otherwise, not so much.

things may or may not pick up soon as my golf league begins. i'll probably post about that a bit, which will probably interest -3 of you. but piss off, it's my blog.

thanks

2008-04-01T18:01:00.002-04:00

thanks to everyone who came out on saturday. i had a great weekend, hope everyone else enjoyed themselves as well.

2008-03-28T20:11:00.003-04:00

i'm not sure who originally thought it would be a really good idea to put human beings inside giant metal objects weighing thousands of pounds and giving them the controls. but really, it was not a good idea, mostly.

happy belated zombie jesus day

2008-03-24T19:03:00.003-04:00

we celebrated in style at dominique's mom's house with an authentic easter dinner of enchiladas and corona. jesus (hey-zeus) would be proud.

i joined a golf league

2008-03-20T19:59:00.002-04:00

the main advantage will be my choice of tee times 2-3 days per week. it's impossible to get weekend tee times around here.

regular golf = beautiful

unfortunate

2008-03-20T19:56:00.003-04:00

today i laid a 9-high flush with an inside straight flush draw down because i knew one of the other guys had a higher flush than i did. he did in fact have a queen high flush. the river was the 8 of spades. i would have tripled up, except that i played the hand correctly. damnit.

sweet justice

2008-03-18T22:47:00.002-04:00

the other day, a customer refused to speak with me. she initially agreed, but quickly backed out. she insisted her position was the correct one, but she refused to explain it to me. she advised me to deal with someone else. unfortunately, that person was not qualified to give the answers i needed.

she put me in a tough spot and in the end, it really fucked her over. i was polite, kind, and helpful, and gave her no reason to be a total bitch to me. but she was, and now she's fucked. i'm quite happy.

woohoo!

2008-03-16T19:11:00.002-04:00

uconn pulled a pretty good spot in the ncaa tourney, AND i have thursday off! too bad uconn plays friday.

it is what it is

2008-03-12T19:41:00.002-04:00

lately, i keep seeing commercials for lifewater and propel "fitness water." i don't understand them. they uselessly banter back and forth about calories and vitamins. my question is, if they have all this other shit in them, why do they still call it water?

when you flavor water, it becomes juice. if you carbonate it, soda...or beer. water is the base for lots of shit. so i don't know why it's called flavored water. it's all flavored water really.

the one that really gets me is the commercial where they say, "if i drink brand X (i think vitamin water), i'll have to do how many more situps?!?!" lame. if you want to drink healthy water and get vitamins, drink water and take vitamins. or buy the fake water for $8/bottle.

win-win...win, or alternatively, the golden rule

2008-03-06T18:15:00.004-05:00

it is somewhat well documented that i have, on occasion, been a participant in verbal altercations with the likes of dell, cvs, and linksys. my mother has always cautioned me that i might not like it if the situation were reversed and someone was yelling at me. i love my mother very much, but she was wrong.

today at work i spoke with a customer who BITCHED.ME.OUT. and i loved every second of it.

there is nothing wrong with a verbal altercation when someone is upset with someone about something. in fact, it's ok to stand up for yourself. do not get me wrong, i am not advocating random arguments. i think many people, including perhaps my mother, hear the word "argument" and think of an uncontrolled all-out profanity-fest. but there's a huge difference.

there are 2 very important factors to keep in mind when arguing about something:
1) before you start an argument, make sure you are correct
2) do not initiate undeserved personal attacks

the first is obvious. the second should be, but seems to be less understood. i enjoyed the customer yelling at me today. first of all, he was blatantly in the wrong. he was arguing something that was incorrect. there was a witness. the witness was a self-proclaimed "long time friend" of this guy. but the witness' statement blatantly contradicted that of the customer. when i told this to the customer, he told me i was wrong. mind you, the customer was not present when i spoke with the witness. the witness wasn't even impartial, but i listened anyway. the witness' overall opinion was in fact that the customer was right. but the facts and the premises did not logically lead to the conclusion.

so when the customer didn't like what i was telling him, he initiated the personal attacks. he became louder and started swearing at me. now, i'm not one to object to some angry swearing, but in my professional life i claim to dislike it. i advised the customer that if he did not cease cursing, the conversation would have to end. he didn't stop, so i ended it.

of course, he called right back. which is fine. but the swearing continued. i logically explained how i arrived at the conclusion that he was wrong, but he wasn't having it. he didn't respond with logic, but rather personal attacks. it culminated with him calling me a "fucking piece of shit" at which point i simply hung up again and moved on to the next task at hand. the whole ordeal really put a smile on my face.

and during the entire time, i remained perfectly calm and collected. mom would be proud.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

UPDATE: mom was very proud

the orange and pink

2008-03-04T21:19:00.003-05:00

today i heard a story where a guy was driving his car and had a seizure which caused him to lose control. he nudged a second car, spinning it around and causing it to strike a parked vehicle. then the original car went thru some bushes and finally stopped when it hit a dunkin donuts sign. i guess america really does run on dunkin.

my new babies--thanks america!

2008-02-28T14:48:00.003-05:00

i'm finally in a good financial position to get some new golf clubs, and it's all thanks to 2 things that are undoubtedly all-american: gambling winnings and earned income credit. thanks everyone!

2008-02-27T23:04:00.000-05:00

man's best friend(s)

2008-02-25T19:08:00.003-05:00

it appears as though the pups now recognize the sound my car makes when it's locking outside on the street and they bust thru the storm doors to get to the front door to meet me. now that's love.

hand of the night

2008-02-24T03:34:00.002-05:00

you already raped me once (i wasn't even dressed slutty), and now you're just getting greedy

2008-02-21T23:04:00.003-05:00

like a bad dream you can't shake, such is my former law school. i thought i was done. i thought it was over. i talk to just one person who's still there, and he'll be done shortly. all my school mail is forwarded to my parents' house. they take it and put it up in my old bedroom, where i can just conveniently throw out the entire pile. we had a great system going...until this week.

it began with an email. somehow "career services" (and i use that phrase more loosely that tom cruise's vagina), obtained my personal email address. in my time at school, i was extremely careful to only use my school email for any and all things related to school. only 4 people--friends at school--had knowledge of my personal email address. anyway, the email asked what i was now doing with my life. if i have found a job, what is it? if not, can they help me find one? now i should mention, that this offer, 9 months after graduation, is the most anyone at that school has ever done to help me find a job.

in keeping with my hatred of this school, i didn't respond to the first email. all they did was shun me while i was there, so why the hell should i cooperate now that i'm out?

then i got a second email. this time it was from a professor that i had for one class. for some reason, said professor voluteered to contact me again for career services. how she knew they were looking for me, i'm not sure. and if they seeked her out, they could've made a much better choice. i still speak with one professor from time to time. he was the advisor for the law and philosophy society. he's awesome. anyway, this professor emailed me asking me to email career services and update them.

if nothing else, i'm a man of consistency. this time, i didnt email career services or the professor.

but just like the mob (probably not a bad overall comparison anyway), they hit me where it hurts--my family. the school called my goddamn mother on me. now, my mother knows how i loathe this institution, but my mom is very nice, and in a moment of weakness (i'm assuming...we have yet to discuss this. i'm waiting until my parents get back from vacation), she gave them my cell number. my last untouched sanctuary.

the school showed me that two can play the game of consistency. not that i would expect anything else, but once again the school admins were a bunch of dumbasses. when the school called, i was at work. my phone vibrated (best feature ever) and i recognized the area code as being pennsyltucky, but i assumed that one of my friends had gotten a new number. one of my good friends from home lives there now and i'm not sure i put his landline into my phone.

i answered the phone, and disappointment immediately set in when i realized who was on the other end. i advised them that i was at work, and would have to speak with them later. instead of understanding the reality of the situation, they brushed my statement aside and asked where i worked, what i did, my title, and if i enjoyed it. i again said i would have to talk to them later, as i was at work. this time it registered, but they still pushed me for a time. ironically, had career services been this pushy when i was still in pennsyltucky, i might already have a job that they know about. but i digress.

the end result is this: i emailed them back with a short, lacking email with the bare essentials of their request. now i'm apparently on some resource list for students who want to learn more about careers that don't involve being someone's bitch. i'm almost ok with this. i'm sympathetic to other students who realize they don't want to practice, especially if they got duped into that horrible institution as many in my class did. but i'm still thinking it might be time for a new email address and phone number.

2008-02-20T23:29:00.003-05:00

mia

2008-02-18T21:00:00.002-05:00

i've been a bit m.i.a. lately. we had a friend visit town, i've been working (same as always), shopping for some golf clubs, and watching msnbc.

the other day we watched this documentary about teen runaways who flock to portland, oregon because of the laid-back atmosphere and the readily available black tar heroin. it was mostly interesting, but there was one girl on it that really annoyed me.

she was a 16 year old runaway. she ran away because her parents were "strict"--they wanted her to do her homework. she would sit on the street and beg for money. she got upset when people told her to get a job. she didn't want to become a "corporate puppet." instead, she wanted to "do whatever i felt like." but then she would go to the free clinics funded by, you guessed it, those corporate puppets.

which is why maybe taxes shouldn't fund these things. sure, there are those truly in need. but there are those who simply won't "stoop" to a job they (subjectively) think they're better than. and then there are those who just refuse to do anything and don't hide an intentional dependency. the thing is, most of the people who work with these social (call them welfare if you wish) programs are too "nice" and don't investigate or discriminate. they want to help everyone. which is admirable. maybe. unless helping someone means making them make themselves useful or responsible. in which case they're enablers.

speaking of which, this is probably incoherent. plus i'm watching "intervention" on a&e. good stuff. i ramble about this once or twice a year. you get the point.

fucking cunt footnote

2008-02-10T13:55:00.000-05:00

after dominique got home from seeing her friend last night, she mentioned that she had talked to her friend about the whole situation with this lady, let's call her sue. anyway, the friend told dominique that she told sue that i never received any call offering me the job. well sue told the friend that she went to england and told some other guy at the recruiting firm to call me and offer me the job. according to sue, he told her that he tried calling me multiple times, left messages, and that i never called back. also according to sue, that guy is "in trouble" about it or something.

maybe it's my universal skepticism, but to me this sounds like a ton of bullshit. everyone placing blame on each other until the whole situation just fizzles away and is forgotten. i don't know what it matters, since they'll probably never see me again. so i don't know why she needs to tell dominique's friend it wasn't her fault when it was. maybe to look good to the friend? or so i won't think less of her? well, i do.

maybe it is the truth. maybe this guy was left in charge of things. still, if she wanted to hire me it doesn't make a ton of sense that she'd just ignore it. especially since the guy said i didn't respond, not that i rejected the offer. maybe she wrote down the wrong number for him. maybe he called the wrong number. maybe he didn't call at all. but sue was my first point of contact the whole time, so there's reason to be skeptical.

it also doesn't make sense that i'd turn the job down. sue was kind of a friend of a friend of dominique, and she knew both thru me and thru the friend who knew her that i was pretty set on that job, especially with nothing else on the horizon and a fairly worthless legal education. i told her multiple times how interested i was in the job (of course i meant in having the job, not in the job itself, a big difference that i didn't bother explaining to sue, however). she talked candidly about what the job was and how she understood if i didn't want to do it. i insisted i did. and i did want the job, because i wanted a job. but anything i got i would've given some time to see if i really liked it. i wasn't about to jump ship to another job immediately. i wasn't even about to apply to other jobs immediately had i gotten that one.

what it boils down to is that she either did or did not leave it in this other guy's hands. sue was a bit flaky, but even she should've had enough sense to know that something was up when the guy told her i never answered or called back. if he even told her that. it just doesn't all add up. the funny part is that it doesn't bother me because that was some ideal job i wanted. i might not have even liked it. i almost surely wouldn't have liked the job, and the atmosphere of the office, as much as i like the job i have now. what bothers me is the lack of responsibility taken on the part of sue and/or the other guy. it might not bother me so much if i didn't work with people all day everyday at my current job as well, where i repetitively see people denying responsibility when it's really quite clear. people are really fucked up.

what a fucking cunt

2008-02-09T14:58:00.001-05:00

last summer, one of the jobs i applied to was for a recruiting company. i wasn't sure that it was exactly what i wanted to do (even when i was thinking hr stuff), but since all my income was generated at the casino i was looking for something a bit more stable. i never would've heard of this firm except that an old friend of dominique's knew the woman who ran the company. like the parent of a friend or something. that's not what's important here.

the more i interviewed, the closer i was to getting the job. the people i interviewed with seemed to like me. however, the more i interviewed, the less i thought i would enjoy the job. but with nothing else on the horizon, i went in for the second and third interviews anyway.

after the last interview, the woman i "knew" (mother of friend of friend of dominique) indicated that she was excited about hiring me, and she just wanted to check one more of my references and she'd let me know the next week. at the end of the next week i hadn't heard from her, so i called. she said she still hadn't been able to get a hold of the reference and that she would try again and let me know the following week. i figured this was ok, because she seemed pretty set on giving me the job, and with that kind of security (say 90%), i figured a few extra days off would be nice. plus i didn't think much of the delay since the reference was an attorney, a group known for not returning calls until there's a reason it will also benefit them.

but she didn't call the next week either. i called back and left a message. the next week went by, nothing. and the next. and so on. eventually, i figured out that the job wouldn't be too interesting for me, but i sure didn't let her know that because i wanted something for now. but i never heard from her again, and that was ok because i ended up with a job i love. and i still love it. but this still makes me mad, because...

fast forward to today. dominique is going to see her friend tonight. she talked to the friend today, and the friend mentioned how she had talked to the woman at the recruiting firm. ok. but the woman at the firm says that it just didn't work out, and that she left me numerous messages offering the job and that i never called her back. what a fucking cunt! i called her a couple times, and she never returned the calls, or she made up some bullshit excuse as to why she couldn't answer me each time.

this is people. people are conniving fucking assholes who try to avoid personal responsibility whenever they think they'll be able to get away with it. well guess what, you fucking whore? you're fucking busted. this is not over.

congrats

2008-02-03T22:41:00.000-05:00

congrats to giants fans. we might've been the best team this season, but we weren't the best team tonight. our offensive line blocked worse than britney spears' birth control. for 3.5 hours there was more swearing in this apartment than even i generally care for. what a fucking letdown. i can't remember the last time that the halftime show was more enjoyable than the game. tom petty and the heartbreakers is great shit. all the commercials sucked though. not even 1 good one.

round is a shape

2008-01-29T17:59:00.000-05:00

dominique heard about this thing at work that's sponsored by our state. it's a program to motivate residents to stay in shape. dominique formed a team with some people she works with, and i thought it was a good idea so i agreed to join. evidently, your team competes with other teams in categories like weight loss or exercise hours per week. of course it's all done on the honor code, but i don't think the point is to win. i don't even know if you win anything. i don't care, really. which is unlike me, true, but i just like having the motivator. i don't make new years resolutions and this will give me motivation to work out. plus, it doesn't start until feb 4 so i have a few more days of sloth left. i also had to guess at my current weight since we don't own a scale and i don't know the exact number. so, i figured might as well be generous. i might already be ahead of the game.

our team has 7 members. i don't know what kind of a draw programs like this get, but i hope it's huge (pun not originally intended, but i kind of like it now). i'm sick of seeing gross fatasses everywhere i go. it almost ruined the chinese buffet for me. almost. it would have, except for the fact that in addition to being grossed out i also started feeling pretty good about myself. can't have average without fat. it's too bad they don't have programs like this for stupid. i guess it's called school, which is also why i guess there's lots of stupid around still.

stupid aside, i need some good getting-in-shape methods for the colder months. i generally run outside when it's either bearable or warm, but winter just pisses me off. plus, once golf season starts i can walk 18 and carry my bag for exercise. so it's really just a month or so of the cold. however, don't suggest cross country skiing. i'm not a skiier, so that's out. also, joining a gym is not an option. if i wanted to pay to hang out with a room full of sweaty half-naked meatheads i'd...well...join a gym.

anyway, let the great experiment begin...

intervention

2008-01-28T21:24:00.000-05:00

dominique and i are watching "intervention" tonight. i don't know who needs it more, the meth addict daughter or her nebraskan family who thinks she's going to hell because she's a lesbian.

this ought to keep you busy for a while

2008-01-23T23:05:00.000-05:00

most wanted lists.

pictures, crimes...fun. also if your state doesn't have much linked from that site just google "[your state] most wanted" and the first or second link should do the trick.

i can't believe how many people try to rob banks. so cliche.

2008-01-21T23:16:00.001-05:00

so fresh, so clean

2008-01-21T18:18:00.000-05:00

i think the next building over from my office manufactures spray paint, because on most days the walk from my car to the building smells delicious.

the world has officially gone mad

2008-01-15T21:01:00.000-05:00

i recently made an appointment with an allergy doctor here in my new state because my old allergy doctor who has seen me time and again for years decided he was going to be a goddamn prick (read: a normal doctor) and not authorize refills on my medication without an in-person visit. i guess i needed to switch doctors anyway, but this certainly gave me a reason.

the new doctor has a pretty extensive website, on which there are forms to print off and fill in for the first visit. at first i didn't like this, but the more i thought about it, it's pretty sweet. i can fill the forms out in my underwear on the couch and it cuts down my time in the office. nice.

so i'm reading the privacy disclaimer they make you sign about when they can release your medical information, etc. it's all pretty standard, except for one paragraph, which most likely is indicative to the fact that the end of the world is almost upon us:

we may disclose your health information to authorized federal officials who are conducting national security and intelligence activities or providing protective services to the president or other important officials.

[new allergy doctor]: no officer, [dicta] couldn't possibly have hijacked that plane and guided it into that building. that muthafucka's allergic to dust!

wintertime, and the livin's easy

2008-01-14T20:39:00.000-05:00

i've officially been done with school for about 8 months now. during that time i went from unemployed bum in my parents' house to professional gambler in my parents' house to professional gambler in an apartment to someone with a "real job" in an apartment. and while the job search was frustrating at times, i have to say, it's been freakin sweet so far.

everyone always kept telling me, "stay in school." "school is awesome. the real world sucks." "you don't want to graduate, it's all downhill from there."

and you know what?

everyone was wrong. i freakin love the "real world."

i can still live in an apartment with anyone i want.
i can still go out drinking on weekends (or any other day i please).
when i get home from a day of work i actually feel like i've done something productive.
i like my job.
i get paid every other week.
when my day ends at 5, i go home and don't have to think about work/papers/exams.
i'm able to keep a regular schedule, as opposed to random class times with fluctuating gaps in between.
i like all the people i work with, but even if i didn't it's easier to pick and choose who i'm around most of the time.
i still get to learn everyday, and i do. and i have more freedom regarding the topics about which i learn.
i can do what i want, which is how i like it.

i guess some of the people who don't enjoy the real world probably feel stuck in shitty jobs they don't like. to that, my response is simple: get a different job. do something in a field you enjoy. of course, you have to be realistic. most people will not get their dream job right away. maybe it's something you work up to. but it's something to work for. it's unrealistic to expect to get your dream job right out of school, unless your dream job is to be an ass-wiper (i'm still accepting applications). i don't know whether it's level of education, upbringing, or something else, but i think a lot of people feel that for some reason they're entitled to the job they want, and it just doesn't work that way. but if people start down a road they don't like, they're going to end up so far down the road that they can't see where they came from.

i had some extreme frustration last summer when i was applying to jobs. in the end it was really my own fault. i went to school for 1 thing, and i definitely didn't want to pursue it further. i changed my mind. and that's ok. i did it to myself. but i didn't let it cause me to lose sight of what i like, what i want. even though i was unemployed, i turned down 3 jobs before finding a job i love in a company within which i can develop a career. and i fully plan on doing just that.

so to everyone who told me to stay in school, thanks but no thanks. the "real world" kicks ass. unless you're talking about that stupid shit on mtv. mtv sucks ass.

no, not me

2008-01-13T12:41:00.001-05:00

i'm not in pennsyltucky anymore. remember? it's why i've been so happy. plus, if you thought it was me, you're not giving me enough credit. i never would've apologized.

sweet sweet justice

2008-01-10T18:03:00.000-05:00

i don't talk about my job too much. i really like my job. there isn't much to complain about, despite the fact that i deal with people for a majority of the day.

today i got to do something that fit right with my ethos. someone did something and tried to pawn the responsibility for the mistake off on another. but i didn't let it happen. i investigated, and discovered the truth. then i called the person on it. the great part is that there's now nothing they can do to evade responsibility. it's awesome.

suck on your personal responsibility bitch!

most eligible bachelor?

2008-01-07T17:57:00.000-05:00

most eligible for parole?
most eligible for shower sex?
most eligible for hiding behind religion?
most eligible for pedophilia with foster children?
most eligible for disbarrment?
most eligible for irony: "In 2000, Zerola opened his own law practice as a criminal defense attorney. His clients included drug dealers and rape defendants."

january

2008-01-03T22:18:00.001-05:00

if you think about it, it's really no surprise that lots of people commit suicide in january. it's freezing cold out, and as if that wasn't enough on it's own, it also makes the idea of regular exercise outdoors seem quite unappealing. and it's ridiculous to pay $30/month to join a gym simply to run.

but the problem of january only gets worse. it's cold, so people stay indoors more frequently. i watch significantly more television during the shitty winter than i do during the awesome spring, summer, or fall. the problem is, january is all reruns. hardly anything is new now, and stuff that is sucks. i don't watch a lot of tv to begin with and i think most shows suck, but it's even worse now.

compounding all of this is the ridiculous coverage that the caucuses and other pre-election crap is getting. there are still 10 months until election day. i hate to break it to the politically excitable, but the candidates just repeat all the same old shit for most of the time up until the election. some will break out late "surprises" to try and sway voters, but right now it's all the same old promises that will inevitably be broken by the future winner by a claim of misinterpretation.

it's a good thing the home life and the job are going well, because i'm getting pretty antsy around here with this crappy winter. i haven't played poker in almost 5 months and i haven't golfed in 3 months. winter = torture.

16-0

2007-12-29T23:34:00.000-05:00

regular season perfection. fuck yeah!

xmASS

2007-12-29T10:23:00.000-05:00

so, did everyone get what they wanted for xmas? like money, or dvds, or boobs?

definitely home

2007-12-22T18:57:00.001-05:00

so i spent the afternoon having lunch with a good friend and his girlfriend, then making a somewhat pitiful yet somewhat successful attempt at holiday shopping. in this time, i ran into 2 random people who i haven't seen in at least a year. a friend of a friend and a guy i used to play baseball with. damn, can't be here without running into people.

everyday is a HOliday

2007-12-19T21:45:00.000-05:00

jesus doesn't do it for me. i only light candles to make the apartment smell nice. and i don't know what they do for kwanza, but i'm pretty sure i don't give a shit about that either.

nevertheless, i love the holidays. i love having a few relaxing days off with family and friends. i'm excited to see my sister. i'm excited to see relatives i usually see once a year. i'm excited to spend some time with my parents. some down time with dominique, santos, and maeby. and i'm excited to spend a few days at home and see some friends who will be around (sorry matt).

sweet.

puppy love

2007-12-15T21:19:00.000-05:00

mitchell report

2007-12-13T22:16:00.000-05:00

all i can say right now is wow. a whole lot of yankees on that list...

jesus fucking christ (tis the season)

2007-12-13T21:35:00.000-05:00

normally, my commute to and from work is about 20 mins. today a snowstorm hit, and my commute home this evening took fucking 4.5 hours. FOUR AND A HALF HOURS. fucking shit. it's like they've never heard of fucking plows, dirt, and salt.

and people are so fucking stupid. i sat in park for a lot of that time. in fucking park. i'm not asking people to speed, but how fucking hard is it to go 5 mph?! not very. and people were just fucking abandoning their cars in the middle of the highway like their cars were inner city babies and the interstate was one giant fucking dumpster. right in the lane they were in or whatever. fucking ridiculous. goddamn winter/snow/people.

2007-12-12T18:26:00.001-05:00

charity scams

2007-12-12T18:16:00.000-05:00

i think this article is amusing in light of a post i wrote last year about how i do charity rather than giving to it. any lazy asshole can cut a check, and as the first article discusses, your money might not even go towards what you think. that was pretty much my point. well that and the fact that it means more to do something than to just cut a check.

classy

2007-12-11T19:10:00.001-05:00

this is pretty ridiculous. i'm all about making fun of shit, especially when people deserve it, but even i wouldn't have gone as far as dressing as va tech victims. i'll talk a lot of shit about how autistic people shouldn't be allowed to purchase firearms, but even i wouldn't make fun of the victims.

i don't know if i posted about it at the time, but for halloween 2006 i knew someone who dressed up as cory lidle, complete with a cardboard airplane and scars. that didn't bother me, so i feel pressed to make a distinction. if you get a pilots license, think you can fly, then crash your plane, you really did it to yourself (and possibly anyone else on the plane or hit by the plane). but the va tech victims weren't guilty of anything except being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

i do have to say, though, that this news does not completely surprise me. in fact, it's about exactly what i would expect from people in pennsylvania.

random news

2007-12-11T18:11:00.000-05:00

this is too funny because it seems like the type of shit i'd do.

and you wonder why i have no respect for celebrities. this is well-written.

as if i needed another reason to want to go to vegas.

i can't show you

2007-12-10T18:32:00.000-05:00

because msnbc.com won't load on my browser for some reason, but cvs got busted for child labor and tampering with employee time cards. that place is such a dishonest shithole. i hate cvs. this is great news.

who? WHO??

2007-12-09T19:15:00.000-05:00

and that is why you don't guarantee a win against the patriots. suck it bitches.

all american

2007-12-08T13:23:00.000-05:00

when you stay in a hotel for a while, you grow to hate living in a hotel. you get sick of the room. so on thursday night we decided to set up some stadium seating in the hallway to (re)watch superbad. we pulled the mini-fridge out of my room and set the laptop on top of it. as soon as we all finally sat down, this old woman comes creeping down the hallway. we politely move back to let her by, but she stops just before us and says "this is my room." then she asks us what we're doing. we tell her we're watching a movie, and she replies, "don't you have a room?" in a bitchy voice. we replied that we did (honestly you old bitch, who the hell goes to a hotel hallway to hang out) and she just walked into her room and slammed her door.

we knew if we did so much as whisper she was going to call the front desk, and we really didn't feel like putting up with that shit, especially because we only had 1 day left, and this hilton was already the shittiest hotel ever (one other guy and i got stuck in the goddamn elevator for 15 mins and once we finally got out no one apologized or even acknowledged us). luckily, the hotel will get our feedback because my company uses that one exclusively in cleveland so we fill out surveys about it, and everyone blasted it, and deservedly so. the other retarded part of this is that our entire floor, except this one woman, was for our company. so i don't know how the hell this woman got stuck between all our rooms, but it was a pain in the fucking ass and so was she. so we did the only reasonable thing we could think of---that bitch got the all american breakfast delivered to her room friday morning at 6am. suck it, bitch.

-----------------------------------

in other happy news, it's awesome to be back on the east coast. we only saw the sun twice in cleveland in 2 weeks, and the second time was just annoying because it was in our eyes on the drive home. once we arrived, it was dark.

also, i got dominique her xmas gift today...a puppy! we went to one of the shelters we like, and they had some great dogs. dominique picked out one she liked, and she did a good job. it's a young female dog, and she has a great personality and is really playful and cute. observe:

akron rocks?

2007-12-01T20:22:00.000-05:00

we have the weekend off, so we ventured deeper into central ohio for the night to where one of my coworkers used to live. we hit up an awesome dive bar and we karaoked the shit out of central ohio. and yes, there was some meatloaf involved, among many other things.

contrary to popular belief

2007-11-28T18:10:00.000-05:00

cleveland does not rock. rather, it idles in its freezing overcastness. i did go to the celtics/cavs game last night which was a great game, except for the final score.

i'm not a doctor, but i'll play one in real life

2007-11-23T10:54:00.000-05:00

i take allergy medication. my allergies are far from life-threatening, but i started taking medicine year round because without it i was having a lot of congestion (although it's up for debate whether or not i still have this) and almost daily headaches. i've been taking this stuff since high school...so maybe 9 or 10 years now. (periodically i try to ween myself off it to see if i can live without it if possible. the most recent attempt was this fall, and as usual, i did ok for the first week or so, but once the stuff was completely out of my system for a while the headaches returned.)

so it should be no surprise to the doctor (or his office) that each month i will refill this prescription. usually the doctor authorizes a few refills at a time, so i only have to call the office 3-4 times per year. right now is one of those times.

i called the office on tuesday and the woman on the other end was a complete fucking bitch. additionally, she acted like she had no idea what i was saying to her, as if i were speaking another language. finally, as i was calmly explaining what i needed, she just cut me off and transferred me to an automated voice/touchtone system that prompted me for a bunch of info then said it would authorize my refill. anyone care to take a guess how that one turned out?

i went to cvs on wednesday, not even to pick up the prescription but to verify that it had been called in (though sometimes the cvs here is really good and automatically fills it when they receive an authorization). it had not been called in. luckily, the lady behind the counter was very nice and gave me 3 pills so i could get thru part of this weekend. but the problem is i'm going to cleveland for work for a while, so i need the prescription now (because we all know doctors don't work on weekends or thanksgiving, so i need the authorization either wed or today).

unfortunately, i didn't get to cvs until after work on wednesday, so the doctor's office was already closed. i knew they'd be closed for thanksgiving, so i figured i'd call today. well, before i got a chance i got a call from my mother this morning telling me that the doctor's office called saying i need to make an appointment before i can get a refill. i have 2 problems with this. first, give me a fucking heads up. don't wait until the last time i try to refill to tell me i need an appointment. this would mean lots of people (assuming this is their standard) would have a gap in medication. but second, and equally as annoying, is the fact that their stupid office bitch put me thru to the automated system where i updated both the cvs i use and MY PHONE NUMBER, yet they still fucking called the old number i left them! what the fuck?! so i'm pretty sure i just gave up a bunch of goddamned info for no purpose whatsoever, because they sure as fuck didn't update anything.

so my mom calls me at 10am to tell me this, and now the office is only open until 1pm today. after 10 mins of a busy signal i finally got thru. the first contact woman just listened to me, took my new address and phone number (again), and send me thru to a voicemail for some nurses line, that MIGHT be able to help me out. also, the only way i could get to that point was to make an appointment. so i made a bullshit appointment for some random wednesday after i get back, fully intending to either cancel it or just plain skip out (need to find out if there's a charge for that with these assholes).

ok this is kind of funny. just as i'm bitching about having to leave a message for the nurses, they called me back. the only problem is the nurse told me that she'll pass along what i said to the doctor and he'll decide whether to authorize it or not. i'm sorry, BUT I WAS JUST TRANSFERRED FROM THAT OFFICE! what the fuck is the point of having the front desk bitch transfer me to you just to have you transfer it to the doctor? is front desk bitch so moronic that she can't do that herself?!! what the fuck. i had better get this shit before i leave or else the shit is going to hit an even bigger fan than it has already hit.

fuck law school, i should've gone to med school. i could've still hired some dumb bitch receptionist, i could've done whatever the fuck i wanted and been completely incompetent and not at all responsible for the shitfaces working in my office, and best of all, i could've prescribed my own fucking medication.

i'm thankful for...

2007-11-22T11:31:00.000-05:00

all the good shit that i've got, and the bad shit i don't.

happy thanksgiving everyone.

what the fuck nfl

2007-11-18T17:00:00.000-05:00

dear nfl:

so here i am, 4pm on a sunday watching football, when the end of the browns/ravens game (which is tied with 2 mins left) is cut off. let's face it, the nfl fucking sucks this year and is about as boring as the nba (holy shit that's bad) unless you're a patriots fan or a packers fan (luckily, i'm a patriots fan). but the problem is, all of the other games fucking suck. they're either not close, or they just have the most pitiful teams playing and the game is only close because both teams really really suck.

now i couldn't give a shit about either the browns or the ravens, but the game was tied at 27 with just a little time left. then i check espn.com to find out that the ravens took the lead, then the browns tied it up right at the end, and then won in overtime. cbs tells us that "due to nfl rules" we can't watch the end of the game. and i understand contracts and broadcasting rights and blah blah fuckity blah, but honestly. when your league is THIS bad and is just going down the shitter (see: pacman jones, tank johnson, and then the inexplicable reinstatement of ricky williams (this i don't understand, cuz if goodell is being such a toughass commish why the hell is he reinstating someone who just tested positive for drugs in april)), a good idea is generally to make your product more marketable, not less. to me, it seems the smart idea would be to allow people who still probably don't give a shit about the teams (read: probably everyone) to at least watch a good finish.

but no, instead i had a choice between watching over-concussed, senile ex-players irrelevantly ramble about how everyone should be sucking LT's dick even though he sucks more cock than tom cruise, and watching the first minutes of the cowboys/redskins game (wake me up when i give a shit about that either). i live in an afc territory. so fuck the first 3 mins of a shitty, non-local nfc game and show me the exciting conclusion of the game between 2 inconsequential midwestern afc teams.